All The Rage
by lifeisbooks
Summary: Popularity-In the dictionary it means liked, or enjoyed by many people; accepted, followed, used, or done by many people. But there are many hidden meanings behind the label. Aline Penhallow is the most popular girl in school, cross her and you're dead. If you stay silent and don't interfere, you might survive high school. Unfortunately for me, I interfered. AU AH ON HIATUS!
1. Prologue:The Popularity Pyramid

**This is my first high school story, and just know that it may be a little dark. Just know that Alicante High is a pregious private school, and I took aspects from my private middle school and enhanced them to make the venom that stirs in high schoool stundents. I may be going a little far, but i really want to empathize how much hatred there is between Aline and Clary. Enjoy!**

Clary POV

Popularity.

In the dictionary it means liked, or enjoyed by many people; accepted, followed, used, or done by many people. But there are many hidden meanings behind the label.

In elementary, it was like the dictionary definition. How nice you were to friends, your kind heart, being generous to other students was the criteria for this term.

Middle school, being popular was more vital than before. It became some what of an obsession for some. Being honorable wasn't as valued as before. It was all about being "in style" and keeping up with "today's trends!"

But high school was when it really got out of hand. Hardly anyone cared about your character, it was all how wealthy you were and how manipulative you could be. "The Populars" had every teacher, member of the student body, and parents wrapped around their freshly manicured finger. Well, the girls at least. Some desperate souls would sacrifice all their morals and values just to claw their way to the top, taking down anyone who interfered.

Unfortunately for me, I interfered.

Unintentionally I had managed to get the most stuck-up popular girl to hate me. Aline Penhallow ruling Alicante School since kindergarten. Every time I slipped up, she was always the one that suffered.

The first time was in kindergarten, when the teacher forgot his safety scissors, and just had to put Aline in front of me. Let's just say when she leaned over to talk to me, she lost a few shiny black locks, and was as mad and vindictive as a 5 year old could be.

First grade, she tried to trip me during lunch as revenge, but my food wanted to catapult onto her pretty little blouse and permanently stain it.

Third grade, (nothing bad happened in second, thank the angel) when she was knocking my book out of my hand and spewing off list of insults off to me, she got caught, and was sent to the principles.

Fourth, I beat her in the school's spelling bee. It wasn't exactly complementing her second place ribbon.

As the years went by, more and more dreadful things kept on frequently occurring to Aline because of me. Each time her hatred for me grew and grew, until we got to this year, where her distaste towards me would make even Satan jealous.

But I didn't like her either. With each year, my hatred grew into a bottomless pit of fury. And this fury was spread to the Popular crowd, every one of them. A real person would realize that it was all a big misunderstanding. Or that I can't control where my food flies, or how good at memorization I am. I didn't get nearly as vengeful as Aline did, but I still hated her. Her and her face caked with the daily one inch of makeup. (Which still made her look like she was a china doll)

It was now sophomore year, and Miss Penhallow vowed to make my life crumble into ashes.

She was the most popular girl in school, regardless of her age. Whereas little me was rock bottom on the "popularity pyramid"

Let me explain myself.

In medieval times order was established by rankings from feudalism and hierarchy (This may not be 100% true, I studied medieval for one quarter last year so that's what I'm going by) There were four levels of power, that was exactly how the rankings for high school went.

At the bottom of the "popularity pyramid", were the serfs and peasants-Me, and others in our school who were antisocial and only had a couple of friends. We manly kept to ourselves, the nerds and geeks of the school. The losers picked last-always us. The ones no one from the upper ranks would talk to us, if it wasn't inevitable. No one deemed us as important. But I prefer being like by just one person who really knows me that be known by everyone, but just by what they heard about us or by the lies spread.

The next tier, was the knights and vassals. Manly the groups of people, a band consisting of Jordan Kyle, Maia Roberts, and a couple others. The second level was just people who weren't fully known, but some people knew who they were and that was all.

Second to the top, the lords. These were the like able people. Most were sporty, but not in the sport where they would be considered a jock. They were well known, a little more than average in popularity. But they know their place and not to get out of line.

Then at the highest point of honor is the royal family. In this case, 7 people rule our school. Aline Penhallow (no surprise there), Jace Wayland, Alec Lightwood, Isabelle Lightwood, Helen Blackthorn, Sebastian Verlac, and none other than my brother, Jonathan Christopher Fairchild.

My brother was hardly even a brother to me. He is completely comfortable with publicly humiliating me, mocking me behind my back, and treating me like I didn't exist at home. He doesn't even take the same car to school as me, I have to get dropped off by my parents because in Jonathan's eyes "I'm too late and will make him tardy".

But back to the royal family. All of them are rich beyond dreams, except for our family could be better off. I guess being a linebacker on our schools varsity football team earned him more credit than I thought. But "the populars" make sure that us "downworlders" (their snide nickname for the lowest "class") had the hardest time at school. However, it seemed as if all of their attacks were focused primarily on me. I guess Aline had told them about how I ruined her life and all that.

The only person who got me through all this was my best friend, Simon Lewis. Our parents had been great friends since before we were born, so I had known Simon my whole life. I couldn't remember a time without him, and I honestly didn't want to. Simon is the one who helps me feel secure in my life during hectic times like high school. He helps me through all the rage of high school and drama. I think I've finally figured out how to handle all of it.

At least I thought I did.

But I also thought that I could trust my best friend with anything.

Times change, but more importantly, people change.

 **If anyone is wondering about the cliff ending, don't worry it will all be explained in time.**


	2. Just a normal day at school

**Wow! 17 followers, 10 favs, and 3 reviews. I have to say I didn't think that anyone would like the story that much. Shoutout to AndromedaChaseHerondale, dauntlesssoldiers, and Keep-It-Loud for the great reviews. Also to my beta for this chapter-winter's cry. If anyone is wondering about last chapters cliffhanger, I regret putting that there because it won't be explained for a couple chapters because I don't want the story to progress too fast. But feel free to PM me if you want to know, and are okay with spoilers.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing but plot, the rest goes to the wonderful Cassie Clare**

 **Sorry for the super long AN, here's the story:**

 **Jace POV**

"But babe I need you too come shopping with me for homecoming so we can match!" A frilly voice whinnied in my ear.

"Aline I told you I can't go shopping with you, homecoming game is coming up soon and our practiced are more heated than ever. As quarterback I can't miss a single practice." I responded monotony, tired of hearing my girlfriend rant on about the same old things.

I forgot why I was even with her. That's right, Aline said we would make the perfect couple with her as head cheerleader and me as captain of the football and basketball team. Everyone just expected us to be together.

There is nothing I want more to dump her, but with Aline being queen bee it would be "social suicide", and everyone of my friends would be forced to turn on me or face the same fate. I would be just like that Clary girl that Aline hates so much. So don't even bring her up unless you want a hour rant-at least-on all the miserable things she's done and how she is the worst human being ever.

"Jaaacce!" Aline shrieked, bringing me out of my thoughts. "Little Clare-bear is over there, lets go have some fun!" A malicious grin spread slyly across her face, remorse pouring into me for "Clare-bear". But that was just the way things were. "Clare-bear" screwed up, and now she had to pay the price.

Honestly, I get that Aline has some war against her but I truly want no part of it. When Aline teases and mocks her it takes all of my self control to not lash out and defend her. It's not that I like her or anything, I just hate who I turned into. Who Aline turned me into.

I used to be a kind caring boy, the epitome of compassionate. Then I became captain and met Aline and it all went downhill.

"-ugly"

"What?" I answered, oblivious to the rant Aline started. (Again I must mention)

"I said she is soooo ugly. Herr shirt was out of season years ago, her shoes are dirty and her pants have paint on them. She should pay attention to what I wear if she ever wants to look even decent." I did a mental eye roll at my girlfriend's conceited words. The winner of the most vain person in the world is... Aline! (No surprise there)

"Aline I'm tired can't we just go to homeroom and leave her alone for a day?" Football was putting too much stress on me, and I did not want to start teasing again.

"But then she might think that we are going to stop and she could-"

"Fine lets just get this over with." I coped, knowing Aline would win.

"Claaare-beeeaar!" She said in the sweet tone that really meant you were done for. There was no one else in the hall but us and rat-boy next to the redhead. Everyone else cleared out. They all knew what was coming. They all stoped caring and just dealt wiht it. Before people usd to

"What now Aline?"

"I just found exactly what would make your outfit better!" She exclaimed, pouring her coffee on Clary once she finished her sentence. "Anything would!"

"Real nice girlfriend you got there Jace," her voice dripping sarcasm as she walked away.

"Aline was really necessary? You've already make her life torture everyday. Can't you just call it quits and stop?" I asked, fed up with Aline.

"First you don't want to help me, then you tell me to stop! Why are you defending that tomato of a redhead and not siding with me?"

"I am not defending her, I am just sick and tired of you always tormenting her. Enough is enough."

"If you can't take it then maybe you should go and find yourself a new girlfriend!"

"Are you breaking up with me?"

"You can either choose me of her what do you want?" Breaking up with Aline would mean she would also go after me. As much as I hated it, I couldn't let that happen.

"You. I will always choose you, I'm sorry sweetheart."

"Good. Walk me to homeroom?"

"Of course."

 _*time skip*_

The rest of the day was like any other. Classes. More taunting Clary and Rat-face. Everything ran smoothly on the same boring loop that I am forced to call life. I just wish something out of the blue would happen, something that made my life more than it already is.

My entire life has been controlled from day one. It was already expected of me to be star quarterback and captain of the football team, to have good grades (even though I am struggling to pass), to be the most popular boy in school.

Popular. Why was that word so crucial to my existence? To me it just meant how well known you were and I don't really care about it. I mean it has its perks, but I could care less. This ranking I hold won't help me to reach my dream collage of Ohio or getting drafted in the NFL.

Aline might actually be worsening my chances. If collages found out how cruel I was to her and other students on "Aline's list", they could reject my applications.

Speaking of, I really need to start applying to my collages. Junior year of high school is when I need to start looking, not to mention it's a very important grade for collages. I could get a full scholarship but I have to make sure I get my grades up. I am on the brink of failing history. Even if it doesn't affect collage, I will get kicked off the football team if I fail a subject. Private schools and their prestigious rules.

I am so wrapped up in my thoughts that I don't even notice the football headed straight for my chest. It deflects off my chest, and that's when the whispers start.

"Did Jace Wayland miss?" "But that was a perfect throw" "Maybe the sun was just in his eyes." A low grumbling sound escaped my mouth. I _never_ missed. _Never_.

"Wayland get your head in the game!" A harsh voice yelled from across the field. "Homecoming is this Friday and I need everyone in their best shape. I can't afford you dropping the ball or missing a pass!" His only volume is yelling, and probably one of the strictest teachers ever. Nothing gets past him, if you slip up he notices it.

"Dude what is wrong with you today?" Jon Fairchild asked, more sarcasm than worry in his voice.

"I just have a lot going on." _Think, what's a valid excuse? Well what was on your mind earlier?_ "Collage you know?"

"I get it bro, why don't you come over to my place and we can practice?"

"Sure I got nothing better." Lie. I had calculus and a history essay, but I always work best at the last possible moment.

"The thing is-Clary what are you doing here!" Jon's stopped mid-sentence by a dainty little figure walking over to us.

"Mom texted and got help up in her art show, you actually have to gasp, drive me home." Her brother tensed up at the statement, unhappy with the predicament he found himself in.

"Can't you just go with nerd boy?"

" _Simon_ , already left and can't pick me up. What's the problem it's just a drive home and you are my brother." She replies, anger creeping into her words.

"Fine. But It's only today and you owe me."

"Such a nice brother," I hear her mutter under her breath. "Is he coming along too?" Pointing at me the venom in her voice is clear as day.

"Yes _Jace_ is coming over, and it would do you good to remember my friends name. Or do you not know what friends are because you are too pathetic to have more than one?" How could he be so mean to his own sibling? She gets it at school and home, I think I might actually feel bad for her.

"Oh I'm sorry if I don't need a whole entourage of adoring fans to make me happy."

"At least I am happy and don't spend almost all my time doing senseless things like reading and whats that fan thing that you are obsessed with."

"One, reading makes you smarter and it's better than throwing a ball around for hours on end, and you are impossible!"

"Let me cut in, football is not 'throwing a ball around for hours on end' it's a sensible sport that is quite enjoyable." I could see the fury on her face and I knew interjecting was the wrong thing to do.

"And if you keep arguing with me I will be forced to leave you here to walk home."

"Fine can we just go to the car?" The sibling rivalry between the two was intense.

o.0.O.0.o.

"Why do you hate your sister so much Jon?" I asked while biting into my third slice of pizza.

"It's just she is so annoying rambling on about books and manga and video games. I just can't stand her,"

"You could try to be nicer to her."

"But whats the fun in that?" He seriously didn't like his sister.

"Your sister could actually I don't know, like you?"

"Well that wouldn't happen unless this asshat here stopped with the carrot jokes." A new voice cut in, one that belonged to a certain girl.

"Well that isn't going to happen _Clarissa_."

"Do you want to go there _Jonathan_?" Just like that I was caught in yet another argument.

"Better than being called carrot."

"At least I do something called focusing on school that you seem to regard."

"That may have explained why dad liked me more." Instantly Clary's face turned to stone, her expression grave. "Shoot, I'm sorry Clary I went to far." Jon had a look of regret on his face, something he never shows. I know that their parents were divorced, but neither sibling wanted to share for information.

"Like always." She called out leaving the room in a puff of anger.

"Great now she hates me even more."

"What happened?"

"It's a... touchy subject," He answered. "I wouldn't want to bore you with the troubled history of our family."

"We have nothing but time."

"I will only tell you if you promise not to tell anyone else. Do you understand?" He hesitated in response, what had their father done that was so bad?

"One hundred percent."

"Sit down this will take a long time."

 **So that's that, I will try to update daily since I am still on summer break, but if you want a story where Jon is a nice brother, check out my other story Plague.**


	3. Hauntings of the Past

**Here's the chapter, Shout out to dauntlessoilder and AnnieBea for your great reviiews thank you so much, and to winter's cry for helping me come up with the plot of almost the entire story.**

 **Disclaimer: I own none of the characters, that belongs to the marvelous Cassandra Clare.**

Jace POV

"Before we were born, our that man loved my mom more than anyone in the world." Jon starts, his pale blond hair covering the sadness in his eyes. "He was the best lawyer in the state-Valentine Morgensten. He never lost a case, until I was 6 and my sister 5. It drove him crazy and he blamed my sister for being so irritable. That's when the abuse started. Valentine started hurting my mother and I don't know if he touched my sister or not, but he always blamed her for everything. Said that Clary was the reason that he couldn't keep up with his work, he even accused my mom of loving her more than him. They didn't get a divorce until I was 8 since Valentine had people preventing it from happening.

"I don't know what he did to Clary but I do know that it was really bad. She's always been shaken up about it. If anyone even mentioned his name she shuts down immediately. That sick excuse of a father never touched me, thank the angel. For some reason Valentine adored me, and was gentle to me but not to my sister. I still don't get he did that to her, but if I ever found the man I would beat him to pieces for what he did to our family." And I thought my past was messed up.

"Have you ever... talked to Clary about what he did?" I asked, hoping my I wasn't prying far enough to shut off Jon too.

"I haven't, but I sometimes go downstairs only to see my mother and sister crying their eyes out and I can only assume the worse."

"Do you think that I could maybe try?"

"Dude, you are welcome to give it a shot but I don't think that you will get anywhere. I doubt even her best friend knows." As if on cue, ratface himself stumbled in the door at that moment.

"What are you doing at my house?"

"Clary texted is she in her room?" Why was he getting to see her? I should be the one comforting her. _Wait WHAT? Since when did I want to comfort Clary? You don't like her, you just feel bad that she's like this, and feel bad for bulling her. That's it_.

"Upstairs" Jon answered, suddenly looking bored. How can he seemed so uninterested at the pain that _he_ put his sister in? Does he have no sympathy?

Simon was gone in a flash of glasses and messy brown hair.

"Want to watch a movie?" Jon offered, all signs of guilt or hurt wiped off his face.

Clary POV

I still can't believe that Jon would do that! He doesn't even know the entire story of what Valentine did to me!

This isn't the first time Jon's slipped up and forgotten. In these situations there's only one person I can go to: Simon. I instantly send him a text

 _Hey can u come over_

 **Why?**

 _I need help_

 **Over in ten**

That was all it took, three little words and Simon would always be there for me. He had such a great past, why couldn't I have been born his twin sister or something?

My fingers twitch with the need to draw, so I grab my sketchbook and just draw. My sketchbook is like my own personal diary. All of my feelings are in there, expressed through pencil and paper. I am always amazed by the fact that my hands seem to move purely of their own accord, I hardly even know what I am drawing until I can look upon the finished product.

"Knock knock." I would know that voice anywhere, the same voice that I can always depend upon.

"Come in." I say flatly, why did I ask him to come over?

"What do you need help with?" Simon asks, while walking over to me and sitting on my bed.

"Simon you know what I need help with." I had told Simon about my past, but I left out some details.

"Something tells me that you aren't telling me everything." Damm it! Why did he have those psychic powers that where he could sense my lies? "You know I can't help you fully unless you tell me everything." Why was he so perceptive?

"You already know about how my parents divorced and how he hurt my mother there's not much left to tell."

"Did he only hurt your mother?" Simon's inquisitive personality was going to make the secret that only one other person in the world knew spill out. I had to trust him right? He was my best friend.

"Your... right." I choked out, my wispy voice trembling from the recollections of the past. "My mother wasn't the only one, _healsohurtme_." I spoke faster than I ever had, as if not being able to understand the words it wouldn't be true.

"He hurt you too!" Simon's face contorted into one of rage, shouting at the new information. That's when the tears started to spill over. I had gone without speaking of it for so many years, all of my feeling that I kept caged in broke free, and I collapsed in my best friends embrace.

"Yes. It started when I was almost five. The first time he hurt me wasn't so bad, it was a blow to my stomach-easily concealable." _Since you spilled it out Clary you might as well tell him everything._ "He hardly ever hurt me, until about a year later when he wanted to punish my mother so he beat me in front of her face. Then the frequency of the beatings increased until I was 8 and they happened everyday. The day before my parents divorced it was the worse. Valentine snuck into the house and beat me senseless when I broke my arm, that was his doing. Everything was healed but I have a scar on the left side of my stomach from where he dragged a knife across it. I haven't seen him since the divorce-the happiest day of my life. But before he left for good, he told me that I was the fault of everything and that he would come for me again."

"HE DID WHAT TO YOU CLARISSA!?" This voice wasn't Simon's however, my brother stood in the now-open doorway shaking with fury and Jace on his right side.

Jon POV

"He hurt you too!" A shout echoed throughout the house, too low for my sister so it had to be the geek.

"You don't think he's talking about... him do you?" Jace's concerned voice rings in my ear, I have to know who hurt Clary. _Wait why does it even matter? I never helped her in years and this is no excuse to go soft. I'm not going soft I just want to know what that he did._ Once I had my thoughts straight I raced up the stairs to my sister's closed bedroom door, Jace following close behind me.

"-It started when I was almost five. The first time he hurt me wasn't so bad, it was a blow to my stomach-easily concealable." _He beat my sister before she was even five years old! What sick creep is he?_ "He hardly ever hurt me, until about a year later when he wanted to punish my mother so he beat me in front of her face. Then the frequency of the beatings increased until I was 8 and they happened everyday. The day before my parents divorced it was the worse." Her words were like knives against my skin, making it hard for me to even stand since I was filled with so much rage. How could that had gone on for so long without me knowing? That's when all the pieces fit in place, the days my sister was sick and couldn't even get out of bed. Why hadn't they told me? "Valentine snuck into the house and beat me senseless when I broke my arm, that was his doing. Everything was healed but I have a scar on the left side of my stomach from where he dragged a knife across it. I haven't seen him since the divorce-the happiest day of my life. But before he left for good, he told me that I was the fault of everything and that he would come for me again."

That was it. I don't care if my sister knew that I was listening, I was too furious to even think.

"HE DID WHAT TO YOU CLARISSA!?" My sister had never look more hurt, tears flowing down her checks like waterfalls, eyes brimmed red around her irises, she had never looked so vulnerable in all her life. Upon seeing me, she jerked out of Simon's grasp, and faced me. What was once forlorn turned to fuming as my sister looked at me, locking her emerald eyes with my black ones.

"Were you listing the entire time?"

"That's not important, what's important is did he really do all that to you?"

"I think it is relevant if you choose to invade my privacy and listen to my conversation!"

"I'm sorry for caring about you if that's what you want me to say!" Both of us were shouting at a dangerous volume but neither of us cared.

"So you pick this one time in my life to finally care about me? I know you brother, you just want something to use against me so you can tell Aline and she can tease me more!"

"You think that's what this is about? I don't sell out my sister I can't believe you think that little of me!"

"So the reason I went to the hospital with a allergic reaction wasn't because you told her that I was allergic to peanut butter and some just magically ended up in my lunch?" She questioned, and I raked my mind to prove her wrong, but I only remembered telling Aline that.

"Oh my god Clare-bear I didn't mean for it to spill out."

"Well you don't seem sorry since you keep on doing it! Where do you think she got the name Clare-bear from? You just keep on spewing information about me to keep your "popular" spot and I am sick of it and sick of you. You keep on letting me suffer and you choose now to come into my life and act like my brother? Come on Simon lets go someplace where people actually care about us." She finished that last sentence with so much venom it stung. And she had every right.

What was I going to do now?

Wait why did I care?

Clary POV

I still can't believe he did that. Not to mention Jace was next to him which meant he knew. _Another person who knows how scared I am._

"My place marvel marathon?" Simon asked with as much gentleness in his voice he could muster.

"You know me so well lets go."

Two bags of popcorn, five packets of candy, and three movies later it was 12am and I had no intention of going back to my brother.

"Can I sleep over?"

"As if I would let you go back over there." He replies, sneering at the end. "Don't worry I'll protect you." I laugh at the absurd comment from him, but it comforts me nonetheless.

"Night" I call out tucking into the couch as sleep comes to take me.

It's the best sleep I've had in weeks.

 **So that's the chapter, and I have** ** _If I stay_** **calling my name!**


	4. Confessions

**So this is my second update in a day, but I was so bored and finshed two books what else was I supposed to do? This is by far the shortest chapter, manly a fiter one.**

Simon POV (I thought it might be fun)

Waking up next to Clary's sleeping figure (and remember they are just best friends like in the books and this is normal) was the best feeling in the world. Seeing her completely at peace and no worries from yesterday just made my day.

I still can't wrap my mind around what happened. That my Clary was beaten and abused and that _she didn't tell anyone_. Was it that she didn't trust me? Does she not know how strongly I feel about her and that I would do anything in the world for.

If she doesn't know how I feel, or if she doesn't trust me enough to tell me everything, I have to tell her. I to confess that I Simon Lewis have been in love with my best friend for ten years. I just had to do the one thing that scarred me most in the world. No biggie.

The love of my life stirs beside me on the couch, looking like the prettiest angel in the world no matter how much she down plays it. Her vibrant red locks are matched only by fiery temper, the bright green eyes that are hidden behind her black-rimmed glasses always have a light shinning in them, and when it was gone yesterday I almost fell apart looking at her. Not to mention how intelligent she is, just lacking a bit in math and bio.

I glance to the clock besides me, it reads 6:45, we slept in.

"Clary wake up we are going to be late to school." I say while shaking her petite form.

"Nooooo."

"Please?" I plead with her.

"Can't we just skip school?" Okay last night really affected her if she doesn't want to go to school, both of us understand how crucial education is.

"I have food."

"I'm up," Her eyes fly open and she scans the room for food.

"You have to get ready first" I tell her while thrusting a shirt and pair of jeans at her; there's always a drawer of the other person's clothes at our houses.

Then she gives me the signature Clary-pout-face, if I didn't have my entire life getting used to it, I would have answered her every whim. I almost do now.

She exits with a pout, but not before I notice there is still a little bit of red in her eyes. If Jonathan does anything else to hurt her I swear...

 _*time skip*_

The day was normal, except for the fact Clary was tenser than usual but who could blame her? Luckily I many classes with her and her brother was in all different classes being a year older. Well that was proven wrong when both of them entered gym before lunch.

"Great. First my least favorite subject starts for the entire quarter, and now it's with these two." It's like I can just feel the fury radiating of of her in waves.

"So long as we don't have to actually be on a team with them or anything."

Lucky they weren't. It was actually the opposite. The teacher wanted to "start out slow" which meant a friendly game of dodgeball. But, when the whistle blew it was anything but friendly to me.

Although I got out almost instantly, Clary stayed in the game the longest of anyone on our team. Something was wrong. Clary was terrible at sports, not to mention she liked get out early with me so we could talk. Her reasoning was explained however, when Jonathan was the only person on the other side.

He couldn't hear them speaking but he definitely knew they were talking. Not to mention Clary's face was getting redder by the minute, something that only happened when she laughed too hard or got mad. The second one seemed the most plausible.

Clary threw a few dodgeballs in vain, but it was ultimately ended when Jon hit her in the side. _Right by her scar_

Fuming, Clary went in the locker rooms since gym was over, and Simon decided that he would have to tell her at lunch.

"Simon." A tired voice huffed out, Jon.

"I'm glad to see you finally remembered my name."

"I'll let that one slide if you tell me whats wrong with my sister." Excuse me! That was like a trigger for all of his hatred for her older brother to spill out, and he didn't stop it.

"What's wrong with her? Look at you completely oblivious to anything related to your sister!" I could see the looks and knew I couldn't give away too much. "You heard her yesterday, she told you everything that you did wrong. Only you didn't listen and let your impulsivity take over! i don't think that you can get out of this one but I would love to see you try." With that I walked away, proud for standing in up for Clary like that. Was there really anything I wouldn't do for Clary? I had to tell her at lunch. before she got attached to anyone or got a boyfriend. _May the odds be in my favor._

* * *

"Clary can I talk to you for a minute?" I asked, leading her away from the throng of people eating lunch.

"Of course whats up?"

"Clary I..." Why was it so hard to say it? Was it because I didn't want to face her if she didn't love me? Or was I more afraid she did feel the same way?

"What is it? What happened?"

 _Why did I decide to do this?_ In Divergent, there is a fear simulation in Dauntless that shows all your fears. The last one that pops up is your worst fear, the one that lives in the back of your mind. In Simon's mind this very moment was his worst fear. (I) You should have just let go, or else you have to tell her now and get it over with like peeling off a bandaid.

"Clary I... I love you."

 **Simon confessed!**


	5. Do You Love Me?

**Here's chapter 5, and just a warning Simon goes WAY OOC and you will probably hate me for it, but oh well. I also realized that I always end on cliffhangers (Thank you to Carre who mentioned it), but I also realized that I have no other way to end it. I like writting with a little suspense, and if it always ends neutral then even I would get bored writting it. (No offense to people who write or like to read that, that's just me) Also the guest who commented on Simon's loyalty, that will all be answerred in the chapter. Sorry for the looong AN.**

 **Clary POV**

"I love you Clary." Simon's words rang around in my head, and they had two meanings. He could mean that he 1) loved me like family, or 2) loved me like in a relationship. I was praying for the first one. It's not that I don't like Simon or anything, I love him. Just, like a brother.

"I love you too Simon." The words lighted Simon's eyes up, it broke my heart to continue. "But like a brother." That fire was put out fast.

"You mean you don't love me... in that way?" My best friend looked as if I destroyed what mattered most in the world, I couldn't mean that much to him could I?

*Just know that the next paragraph is practically copied from City of Bones*

"I'm sorry Simon, I don't. I mean you've dated all those other girl didn't you?"

"I was trying to make you jealous!" _What?_ "Clary," His voice was rough and jagged, anger filling his voice. "I have loved you for the past 10 years and I though it was time I finally confessed."

10 years! How could I have been that oblivious? But Simon would never lie to me like that. Would he?

"Simon I-" I am cut off by Simon pushing his lips against mine. At first I try to enjoy it, to see if I loved him back. After a few seconds, it was proved the love was unrequited so I had to pull away. I couldn't lie for the rest of my life saying that I loved him.

"It's obvious that you don't feel the same way so I'll just leave you alone." Was my best friend walking away from me?

"Simon! Simon!" He just walked away from me without a second glance. Why did I have to do that? I should have just faked it. But he would have seen through my lies and found out. That would have hurt him more. Right?

There isn't much time to process the past evening as the bell rings and I have to be at math.

But Mr. Wayland's lesson on limits are the last thing on my mind as I think about Simon.

o.0.O.0.o.

Once the day is over the first thing on my mind is Simon. I have to see him and talk about what happened. Luckily I spot him walking to his car-a beat up banana yellow one I might add-and shout his name.

"Simon!" He turns around, but keeps walking. I dash up to him not caring how many people may be watching, but I didn't care. "Simon Lewis!"

"What Clary, what do you want? If you've come to tell me how you don't love me then you can just leave."

"Simon you've know me your whole life, how could you ever think that I would have any intention of hurting you?"

"Well considering you just broke my heart in half, I'd say you are fully capable. I can't go through life just watching you carelessly dating other boys, falling in love with them and eventually marring someone else. You know what, I can. You are the the one causing all my misery so there is one simple solution. I just don't have to see you. As of now Clary why don't you find yourself a new best friend. Don't talk to me ever again, don't show up at my house, and delete my number. I'm done Clary. Have fun with your life." I was paralyzed as the Simon I once knew drives away without even sparing a glance.

I can't believe what just happened, nor can I stop the red hot tears flowing down my checks and splattering down on the sizzling pavement. It was if I had I had been hit by a truck. I couldn't process the world around me. My chest felt like it was about to collapse, my head about to explode, my heart about to give up. I was running. To where I don't know, I just had to get out of this place.

"Clary!" A voice calls out my name but I don't care who it is, and I can't have anyone seeing me like this. The tears are clouding my vision not to mention making it near-impossible to see with my glasses.

"Clary are you okay?" A hand jerks my shoulder backwards, so I can see the person calling my name. Jace. If it was any other person I'm sure I would have believed the concern in his voice was real, but I new better.

"Go away Jace." I was desperately trying to keep my voice steady, but to no avail.

"I saw ratface yelling at you, and now you are in tears. What did he say to you?"

"What he said to me was none of your business, now leave me alone." Trying to get information for Aline while I was in the worst state. Could he get any lower?

"If you are like this I think it matters."

"Jace just leave me alone I don't have time for this."

"Where are you going? You shouldn't be walking in this state." Where was I going? My only choice was home with my troublesome brother.

"I..." He knew where I lived so I couldn't tell him the truth, and I've never been much good with lies. "have a job thats not far away that I need to go to so can you please let me go?"

"A job? At least let me drive you there."

"As much as I appreciate the offer, I have to go now."

"Clary you have to let me."

"No I don't Jace. I don't owe you anything, so go bother someone else!" I practically shouted, not willing to deal with anyone else. With that I walked away and didn't look back, even to Jace's calls of my name.

 **Mom-I am still held up, have Jon give you a ride home again.** Good thing my mom wouldn't be showing up at a school were I wasn't there.

 **Me-Sure thing, see you later.** With that I closed my phone and departed on the long walk home.

 **Jace POV**

When I saw Clary crying, I don't know what happened but I instantly wanted to wipe away the tears and make her feel better.

Seeing her up close, it hit me like a bullet. It was much like the night before, but she seemed to be even more hurt.

I don't even know why Aline picks on her. I know that Clary is on her bad side but Aline acts like she's the devil. I mean she definitely isn't the prettiest girl in the world. Her hair was too bright, making her eyes a dull shade of green. If you could even see her eyes behind those glasses. Not to mention how short she was, at least a foot shorter then me. Maybe if she got contacts and heels... _What the hell Jace! You cannot be thinking about Clary like that! You are dating the prettiest and most popular girl in school and can't give it up for a lowlife nerd! Besides she hates you anyway._

I could not be falling for Clary, I just don't like seeing people in distress thats all. I have no feelings for the redhead whatsoever. But picturing her walking away from me, I couldn't help but feel a sharp pain of sadness as her red locks disappeared from my vision.

 **So that was the confession and the results. I hope you don't hate me for making Simon so cruel but it is essential for later in the story.**


	6. A New Me

**Hopefully you guys don't hate me for the shortness** **of this chapter and Simon. Sorr about all the book references alse, but can you blame me?**

 **So this is an extremelty short chapter, more of as fiter because I can't think about what to do next. AndromedaChaseHerondale, this pretty much answers your question. Guest, I can't answer all you questions but just know I am a fan of Clace. (Spoiler) Also a thanks to Ella Blackrose for your great comment. Thanks to anyone else I neglected.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing but plot, everything else belongs to the creative Cassie Clare.**

Simon POV

I still can't believe that Clary doesn't love me. Well she does but not in the way I do. Not to mention how I completely screwed up any other chances I might of had with Clary after school.

I told Clary that I didn't want anything to do with her, I wanted to cut off all connections to her. _Was that what I really wanted to do to Clary? She may not love me but I am the only person she confides in, so what happens if I cease communications with her?_

Thoughts where swirling around my head, manly me blaming myself but I felt like would collapse. It was as if the weight of the world had collapsed on my shoulders, there was no way to describe that. Scratch that, Percy Jackson did in "The Titan's Curse".

"It was the heaviest thing I'd ever felt, as if I were being crushed under a thousand trucks. I wanted to black out from the pain, but I breathed deeply... Afterward, I tried many times to explain what it felt like. I couldn't." Even the great Rick Riordan couldn't explain the pain I was feeling. What Percy was feeling was all physical pain. But It's the emotional wounds that leave the deepest scars.

Who felt the most pain? Had a loved one ripped away from them, for some unjustified reason? Of course, the book reeling the most tears and crying readers. _The Fault In Our Stars_ (WARNING SPOILER FOR TFIOS) Hazel had Augustus taken from her, and he was her true love. "It was unbearable. The whole thing. Every second worse than the last." Seems like Hazel gets it.

When you love a person more then you love yourself, when you would do anything for them no matter what happened to you, when you finally found that someone you can be in a blissful state. But if you get forcefully yanked from that blithe state and get stuck in a life with only memories of them, it can ruin you.

Why did this have to happen to me? I mean it's not like I've done anything regretful in my life. Except admitting to Clary. I'm serious, WHY DOES KARMA HAVE TO TAKE IT OUT ON ME!? Was it something that I did? What did I do to Clary to make her detest against me? If I loved her then why couldn't she?

I am sick. I am sick and tired of always being at the bottom. I'm one of the least popular people in the entire school, I was always fine with that. But that was when I had Clary with me. Now I have no one. _There has to be some way to get out of this, think Simon! How can I fit in with other people and forget about Clary?_ There's only one way to do that. Become popular. It was the perfect solution. This way I could have more friends then ever, meet someone new, and to top it all off, anger Clary. Both of us hate the populars. Sorry I _hated_ the poplars, past tense. All I had to do was set up a couple appointments and spend a day at the mall, spending all my money. However, if it worked then I would be reinvented into someone I had always dreamed of being.

"Mom I'm not going to be home until dinner, don't get worried."

"Of course not sweetie. Enjoy yourself."

The end of that call, was the start of the new Simon.

 **Hopefully you guys don't hate me for the shotness of this chapter and Simon. Sorry about all the book references also, but can you blame me?**


	7. A School Shocker

**So, if anyone was upset after yesterdays clifhanger, you might as well not read this because this is probably the biggest cliffhanger in the series and you will probably hate me. Anyway I realized that my sttory if progressing WAY too fast, so it may take a little while for everything to be explained but it all will. Shoutout to AnimeFan972 for the heartwarming review.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing but plot, the rest goes to Cassandra Clare.**

Clary POV

Is it even worth it to go to school today? If I go to school then I will be forced to see Simon since we have almost every class together. Besides what should I do if I run into him? What am I doing? Simon obviously wanted to anger me, so why should I give him the satisfaction of cowering to him? He can do whatever he wants, it's quite apparent I'm not anywhere in his life anymore. Those were just the thoughts I had debating to get out of bed. Today was going to be one giant headache. Great.

I still can't believe what Simon did to me yesterday. He went back on his promise that we would always be there for each other. (I know it's so cliche but we were little, our minds didn't register cliche.)

*Flashback*

 _I couldn't hear anything over the sound of my crying. The warm drops that showed how weak I was kept running across my checks, and I was powerless to stop them._

 _"Clary!" A concerned voice shouted my name, but I didn't care. Couldn't a kindergardener be alone in their grieving? "Clary look at me. It's Simon." Seeing the familiar sight was comforting, but I still wanted to be alone._

 _"I want to be alone Simon."_

 _"Aline again?" I nodded, little as she was she was ruthless._

 _"She..." The tears were making it hard to speak, every word struggling to make it out. "Said my hair was redder a fire and that i should dye it. She said it made me look ugly, like there were flames on my head."_

 _"She's just jealous. She wishes her boring black hair would be as exciting as yours." Even from the beginning he always knew what to say._

 _"Do you mean it?"_

 _"Of course I do, and if she ever teases you again I will be there okay?"_

 _"Promise?"_

 _"How about this." He holds out his right hand, his pinky extended. A mile long grin appeared on my once-sad face. "Take my and repeat after me." I obliged, hooking my tiny finger with his. "I promise to always be there for you whenever you need it."_

 _"And we will never give up on each other." I added, wanting some input in this._

 _"Of course." Simon smiled with a happiness that only mine could match._

*End flashback*

I cringe at the thought of the memory. That was before Simon went back on his word. The entire idea of "friendship" once brought me joy and made me ebullient. Now it ignites pure hatred, hatred that is adding to the pit of darkness in my stomach.

"Clary hurry up or you will miss breakfast!" my mom's voice surprised me, I hadn't expected her to be home and I don't recall seeing her last night. Or was I too depressed to notice. Anyway it's a good thing so that she can be my transportation for school. I am not riding with Jon or walking again.

Marching downstairs, my mom glances at me and her face drops. Did she know what was going on? Could she sense what was wrong with me?

Glumly I accepted toast and bacon, although eating was the last thing on my mind.

"So how are you doing Clary?"

"Just fine." Dang it! I only use the word fine if I am upset, if my distress wasn't obvious before it way now. I should have just made a bright fluorescent sign that said "Just dumped by best friend!"

"What's wrong Clary? Is it Aline again?" My mom had forced the truth of Aline out of me, but last year I lied and told her that she was done with me. I never lie to her, but I couldn't handle the constant nagging.

"Nothing, and everything is fine with Aline."

"Then it's Simon isn't it?"

"I... I don't know what your talking about." I sputtered out. Cross out the neon sign, I should have just advertised it on tv.

"Oh please. You didn't call Simon last night, and you are depressed. Simon always makes sure that you are never depressed."

"Mom," I stammered to find a suitable lie. "We just have a lot of pressure on us this year as sophomores, and Simon texted me this morning saying that his phone was dead last night."

"Right. Well hurry up, don't want to be late do you?" My mom seemed to have dropped the topic for now. But I was going to have to seem happy next time or she would know something was up. Even if she never acts like me mom, if I didn't improve my acting skills even Jon would know what's up.

 _*time skip*_

I still don't know how I convinced myself to come to school today. Just the thought of seeing Simon made my blood boil and my nervousness go haywire. Strange combination.

Not to mention the fact that Aline will be here again to torture me even more with her venomous, unoriginal words. I was finally able to handle it this year, but that was after years of Simon consulting me daily. Now that I didn't have him by my side, I lost any backbone that I ever had. She hadn't even come up to me yet! _Maybe you can fake sick if you run too the nurse and pretend you have a fever or something and you have to go home._

I can't do that, I have to stand up for myself and show them that I can defend myself Simon or no Simon. As my locker approached I got ready to fight back against Aline. The next sight I saw however, instantly took away any courage that I had within me, and I was left gaping like an idiot at the sight before me.

Simon, on Isabelle Lightwood's left hand side. You only walked with them if you were one of them. Simon had become one of the populars.

 **This explains Simon's new look doesn't it?**


	8. Open Your Eyes

**So here's the thing, if you want to be a critic to my writing, then please tell me what you don't like, so I can improve my writing in that area. But if you want to just straight-out bask me, just know I will not even read it because I could care less if those are your only intentions. AnimeFan, thanks for getting so into my story, it really encourages me to write more. deadguest, I completly agree with you on Simon.**

 **Disclaimer: I own nothing but plot, CC gets the rest.**

Clary POV

I couldn't breathe. _Simon Lewis, the geekiest boy in the world, a popular? This has to be some kind of joke?_ But from the looks of it, this was real. Not to mention that Simon looked the part.

His dark, once gangly chocolate colored hair had been cut to a more "in style" mature looking cut. The characteristic word shirt was replace with a dark cerulean blue t-shirt and a leather jacket. He had on long black jeans that complemented his outfit nicely. But what struck me most of all was his eyes. You could fully see them, no glasses were on his face anymore. Contacts made his deep brown eyes stand out, he looked _hot_. Not in the way that I found him attractive, it was just a general observation.

Girls nearby were giving him a second glance for once, the very sight made me sick to my stomach. Aline strutted over to me, and I was wishing for anything but.

"So Clare-bear, do you like Simon's new look?" I scoffed, wishing the little nerd was back. "Just think, Simon here is a part of our group now." I was hoping he was just trailing them, but one of my worst nightmares had just come true.

"Simon? Is it really you under there?" I asked, my voice full of incredulously.

"Of course it is Clary, it took a while but I am finally who I was meant to be."

"Can you even hear yourself? Where is the old Simon the _real_ Simon?" I didn't care that I was putting all of my pleading into my voice, my best friends had to be in there somewhere.

"This is the real Simon."

"And just think, all Simon needed to do was spill some embarrassing secrets about you." Aline's high voice ringed around in my ears. _Simon betrayed me?_

"Please Simon, this isn't you." I was practically begging him.

"What I was before this was't me, this is me."

I couldn't take it anymore. Slamming my locker, I stormed away from the conversation. I didn't even know where I was going I just had to get away.

"Clary are you okay." The same voice that wanted to drive me home yesterday once again called out my name.

"Just go away Jace. If Aline sent you here to torment me anymore can't you just save it for later?"

"How could you think that I would be here on Aline's wishes? I need to know if you are okay." Pure concern stains is voice, and I am left perplexed by Jace Lightwood.

'Oh I don't know, probably because you are her boyfriend and carry out her every whim."

"Clary Aline isn't important right now. I want to know if you are okay."

"Why do you care so much about what happens to me or if I'm okay?" I can't help the rage seeping into my voice, turning it black as night. "For the past my life you have never given me a second glance, you just keep on going with your girlfriend and make my life a living hell each and every day. And only now you want to see if I am okay? My best friend that I have known since birth just... abandoned me and threw me away like I was worthless. Do you think that I am okay?" I don't care that my face is as red as my hair, I just need a response.

"Look I don't like what Aline makes me do but i have to do it because..."

"You want to stay on the top of the popularity pyramid?" I finished for him

"The what?"

"The popularity pyramid. Lameos like me are on the bottom, then the people who actually have a life are up another level, followed by the sports half-jocks, topped off by Alicante High's very own "popular squad"!"

"There's actually ratings in this school?"

"How oblivious to the world around you are you? Yes there are ratings that segregate everyone in this school. How do you think I got to the bottom? Your precious little girlfriend put me there using her power from the top. That's why outside of your group no one ever goes up to speak, and whenever you talk to someone they stutter right?" He nods, of course I'm right! "That's because they don't want to offend you and risk ending up with me. They're all _afraid of you_ "

"That's not actually true, that can't be true." How dumb can he be?

"It is Jace. Open your eyes to the world around you and see the world in a real light. Life isn't just flowers and roses, there is hurt and hatred in this world that you are to blind to see. Until you do something about it you will always get the same reaction out of people."

With that I storm away (once again), leaving him dumfounded and in the dust.

Jace POV

That can't really be how people perceive me is it? There's only one way to find out. "Hey Matt!" I call out to a football player on our team. His reaction is what I feared. He seems shocked that I even talked to him, eyes almost falling out of his head.

"You.. you know my name?" He sputtered out, his words scare me the most.

"Of course, you are on my team why wouldn't I know your name?"

"I just assumed-I mean I didn't-I have to go to class." Now I was the one to gape. Everything Clary had said was true.

I mull over my thoughts during AP calculus (Even though I suck at history for some reason I am insanely good at math.) People are actually afraid of me. It's not like I did anything wrong I only followed what my friends did. _I hung out with the wrong people_. That's when it hit me. People always take you for your company. By hanging out with the "popular squad" everyone always thought I was just like Aline. The rest of us don't even tease unless Aline makes us. And we all cope with it because we don't want to risk angering her. All the pieces fit into place.

I can't let this happen to me, I can't have people thinking that I am a stuck up jock who preys on the bottom of the "popularity pyramid". I have to make things right with everyone, starting with the person that I wronged most.

Clary.


	9. Behind The Tormented

**I just want to say thank you so much for all the amazing comments from finlizabeth123, and Ella Blackrose. Also to AnmieFan972 andd AnnieBea for the... inspirational comments. (Don't worry AnnieBea your panther will have no reason to hunt me.) I also want to apologize wbecause this isn't even a chapter, it's just a preview because tryouts for my schools volleyball team are tomorrow so I am really tired and may not update tomorrow. This is forall of you followers that don't like Simon, see it from his POV.**

Simon POV

After watching Clary storm off I was pricked with remorse, but that only increased my the vindictive side of me. What right did she have to be enraged with me? I was the one who was always there for her. When Clary was in distress I was the one who comforted her. Since birth she has been like a sister to me, more then a sister. If she was really my best friend and could read me as good as she says than how could my feelings not have been obvious to her?

I couldn't be more obvious then if I strapped a neon sign to my forehead saying "I love my best friend!"

Now she probably hates me. But I hope she does. I hope Clary feels the same exact way that I did when she ripped out my heart like the evil queen (high five to whoever gets this reference) and crushed it in her petite hands, for me to feel in all its antagonizing agony. I mean she was my best friend and she just hurt me like that!

Clary can see what she missed out on, what she turned down when sh didn't love me. I should get a girlfriend just to infuriate her even more. Maybe Isabelle. _No way. You may want to get back at Clary but no matter how low I have already sunk, I will never use another girl. At least I'm not completely gone._

"Did you see the way that she waked out like that?" _Ugh, Aline._

"I have to go, I'll catch you at lunch." Jace stated, then left in the same direction Clary had. Where was he going?

"Aline when are you ever going to end this... feud with Clary?" Isabelle inquired, yet sounding equally bored at the same time.

"It's not a feud it's a war. Also she wronged me too many times. She needs a taste of her own medicine." I snort from the statement, remembering Clary's migraine pills. "What's so funny?" She asked directing her question at me.

"It's just that Clary has the disgusting migraine pills that she sometimes takes. Trust me she hates them."

"So she does, thanks for the info Si!" I cringe, my nickname just felt wrong coming form her vile mouth.

This was going to be a long day.


	10. Behind The Tormented-Full Chap

**So I sort of was neglecting my fanfiction, and that was because I am just going through this fanfiction-netflix-Throne Of Glass- faze where I couldn't come up with anything. I honestly didn't expect 6 reviews on what was just a snippet of a chapter. Reviews:**

 **FairyFlare: Thank you so much for the comment, hope you enjoy this chapter.**

 **Guest: I feel aawful for Clary too but just know that you might not like this chapter much.**

 **torigirl03: It sure is, I love that show.**

 **FangirlForLifeDisorder: I LOVE your nickname and thank you.**

 **Famous0618: I thought about that happpening, but the only way that happens is if she is is Aline's group, and that would never happen.**

 **Sorry for the wait here's the chapter!:**

Simon POV

After watching Clary storm off I was pricked with remorse, but that only increased my the vindictive side of me. What right did she have to be enraged with me? I was the one who was always there for her. When Clary was in distress I was the one who comforted her. Since birth she has been like a sister to me, more then a sister. If she was really my best friend and could read me as good as she says than how could my feelings not have been obvious to her?

I couldn't be more obvious then if I strapped a neon sign to my forehead saying "I love my best friend!"

Now she probably hates me. But I hope she does. I hope Clary feels the same exact way that I did when she ripped out my heart like the evil queen (high five to whoever gets this reference) and crushed it in her petite hands, for me to feel in all its antagonizing agony. I mean she was my best friend and she just hurt me like that!

Clary can see what she missed out on, what she turned down when sh didn't love me. I should get a girlfriend just to infuriate her even more. Maybe Isabelle. _No way. You may want to get back at Clary but no matter how low I have already sunk, I will never use another girl. At least I'm not completely gone._

"Did you see the way that she waked out like that?" _Ugh, Aline._

"I have to go, I'll catch you at lunch." Jace stated, then left in the same direction Clary had. Where was he going?

"Aline when are you ever going to end this... feud with Clary?" Isabelle inquired, yet sounding equally bored at the same time.

"It's not a feud it's a war. Also she wronged me too many times. She needs a taste of her own medicine." I snort from the statement, remembering Clary's migraine pills. "What's so funny?" She asked directing her question at me.

"It's just that Clary has the disgusting migraine pills that she sometimes takes. Trust me she hates them."

"So she does, thanks for the info Si!" I cringe, my nickname just felt wrong coming form her vile mouth.

This was going to be a long day.

 _*time skip*_

Clary POV

I'd lie if I said I didn't want to leave school. I debated ditching, and even transferring schools. But I couldn't give Aline the satisfaction of knowing that she got under my skin. And if I transferred my mom would need an explanation and I sure wasn't ready for that.

it was just lunch but I felt like dying. Standing in the arduous lunch line, I gave careful consideration to this whim. _Would anyone really miss me if I was gone? I have no friends, my mom would learn to get over it. What Aline said-what Valentine said must have all been true. I really am a worthless waste of life aren't_ I?

"That will be $4.95 please." A lunch lady said, breaking me out of my self discriminating trance.

After handing over a five, I was wrong to wish that I wouldn't be bothered.

"Oh Clary!" Oh great.

"What do you want now Aline?"

"I just wanted to make sure you were alright and everything. I mean Simon told us all about how you get frequent migraines." _She knew! Simon told! Oh god just hearing that is giving me a migraine right now. I need to get out of here._

"While I am so glad you care for my health, I have to get going. Goodbye Aline."

"Oh but I'm not done yet. I mean the fact that you get migraines must mean that you are mentally unstable and should get help. I know this great place for the mentally insane, you'd fit in great!"

"You have got to be kidding me Aline. I get that we have had a rough past but I am not going anywhere and I personally don't see as to why you apparently want to get me out of the school."

"Oh trust me it isn't just me that wants you out of this school. Everyone here hates you now that your best friend has suddenly seen the light. No one would miss you if you dropped dead and I frankly hope you do just that." Another one of my fears-confirmed.

"Aline can I talk to you for a second?" Jace. What was he doing here? I certainly couldn't have him backing her up.

"Not now Jacey can't you see I'm doing something important?"

"No this can't wait I need to talk to you _now_." The strain he put on the last word almost scared me.

"Fine then, see you later waste of life!" With that she left, her arm wrapped around Jace's

Dumping my lunch into the trash, I pondered Aline's words. 'waste of space' 'everyone hates you' 'no one would miss you if you dropped dead'. _Was that really all I was in life? A waste of space that will never have any use?_ Some part inside me knew that I shouldn't care what others say but another part of me couldn't bat her harsh words away. _Drop dead? Would anyone really care if I was breathing or not?_

With that I opened safari on my phone, and typed in "how to kill yourself"

After looking through a couple of pages and realizing I couldn't get a gun, I had decided my fate. Tears streaking down my face, I knew this was the best option. No one would ever get to me again. I was still finding the simplest way when a voice over my shoulder called out my name.

"Clary?"

Oh crap.

 **So who hates me now?**


	11. You're Not The Only One

**Sorry for not updating earlier, I meant to do it yesterday but I was just to tired,a dn my parents forced me to watch a family movie with them so that's why this is up a couple hours later then I wanted it to be. Not to mention the fact that it is 12am and I have to be up early for my orientation tomorrow and looking like a zombie. Who needs sleep when there is fanfiction? Anyway aside from my messed up personal life, I loved the feedback from the last chapter, it seemed to be a good choice.**

 **Winxfanfic132-I will try to make my chapters longer (this one is almost twice as long as usual), but I might not always be writing lengthy chapters.**

 **finlizabeth123-I know, it killed me inside making Clary have such a miserable life and Aline so cruel. Then there is Simon who is a whole mother story of you know what I mean.**

 **FairyFlare-don't worry, I will make sure your requests are in this chapter and others.**

 **KackyK04-Thanks, I will try my best**

 **AnnieBea-I know, I leave off on too many cliffhangers**

 **Ella Blackrose-hopefully this can satisfy your fanfiction requests**

 **C.J.-The-Weirdo-I know I am, but aren't all good authors one?**

 **Guest-Yes I did, am currently reading the thrid book and in love with the series.**

 **colorful565-Did you read the series too? And thanks**

 **WinxFan1066-Haha I will try.**

Jace POV

I was fuming all throughout the day. I had just about had it with Aline. I mean using Clary's best friend like that to riffle her up. Right now I honestly didn't care who "shipped" us, I was fed up.

At lunch all of my self restraint had gone out the window as I saw Aline going at Clary _again_.

"...wanted to make sure you were alright and everything. I mean Simon told us all about how you get frequent migraines." _Really Aline? As soon as you get new information you pounce at the first chance. What did I ever see in her?_

"While I am so glad you care for my health, I have to get going. Goodbye Aline." Even from far away I could see the tear rimming on the edges of Clary's face, a mask of pain.

"Oh but I'm not done yet. I mean the fact that you get migraines must mean that you are mentally unstable and should get help. I know this great place for the mentally insane, you'd fit in great!"

"You have got to be kidding me Aline. I get that we have had a rough past but I am not going anywhere and I personally don't see as to why you apparently want to get me out of the school." At least she was finally standing up for herself.

"Oh trust me it isn't just me that wants you out of this school. Everyone here hates you now that your best friend has suddenly seen the light. No one would miss you if you dropped dead and I frankly hope you do just that." That was it. The last straw. While I had handled her teasing Clary, telling someone to go and kill themselves was a whole new section of abuse. Clary already handled physical abuse in her past, now this endless mental and emotional abuse.

"Aline can I talk to you for a second?" I said, straining my voice so it didn't show the anger that was churning in me.

"Not now Jacey can't you see I'm doing something important?"

"No this can't wait I need to talk to you _now_." Hopefully the b*tch would leave alone Clary.

"Fine then, see you later waste of life!" With that she left, her arm wrapped around mine.

I immediately shook her off and practically dragged her to the lockers, a place deserted at lunch.

"Now what was so important that you had to drag me away from what I was doing?" The innocence in her voice made me wanted to gag, she was anything but.

"Don't pull of the whole 'I didn't mean it act'." I stated, adding finger quotes to empathize. "I have put up with this masquerade for too long. You always torment Clary then meander off as if nothing happened. What you don't get is that your words actually affect people. Telling someone to go and kill themselves is something that you can go to jail for Aline. I can't take it anymore and that's why I am doing something I should have done a long time ago. Aline it's over." _Huh. That came out much more well versed then I thought. But the vein on my head that is about to explode show give Aline enough evidence to accept my words._

"You want to WHAT!?" She screeched, loud enough for the entire world to her the disbelief in her voice. Honestly I don't know why she was so surprised. Didn't she see how hesitant I was with her. Not to mention how many arguments we had had.

"I said we need to break-up. What you do to Clary is unforgivable and you haven't stopped. Today was the last straw. I said it once and I will say it again. We. Are. Over." I said, my voice deep and assertive. I could almost feel Aline trembling underneath what she called clothes.

"We can't be broken up, we are the couple of the school. Why do you care so much for one little wench, unless you would rather have her than me." I couldn't believe it. She was still attacking my Clary. _Wait, where did the my come from? She was Jonathan's sister and a girl I had never looked twice at. Why was it now that I was actually seeing that girl as a human being? I'll deal with this latter, one problem at a time._

"I would rather be with anyone than you Aline, get that through your thick skull. Goodbye." With that I walked away, walking with a spring in my step from finally being free.

I was brought out of my state of revelry, by the soft sounds of weeping. Out of instinct, I listened, craning my ears for the person grieving.

There was only one person near-by, a person with flaming red hair.

Clary.

The same girl who showed me that the world is not as perfect as it seems. That peace is really impossible with the amount of hatred, and envy, and sorrow in this world. The girl who in one meeting, showed me the world from a different point of view. And the way I repay her is having my ex-girlfriend tell her to kill herself.

She is to enveloped in her tears to notice that I am approaching her, peering over her shoulder to see what she is looking at.

"how to kill yourself" The words are typed in the search engine. I can't believe my eyes. Clary Fray, the girl who everyone overlooked, the girl who saw the world in it's correct light, was wanting to remove the light from her eyes.

"Clary?"

Clary POV

"Clary?"

 _Oh crap._

I was so distracted in finding a good way to dispose of myself, I forgot other people could see me.

Worry was shaking throughout me, fear trembling and putting evoeryone of my nerves on overdrive. There was still a chance he hadn't seen what I was looking at. If He had, what would happen?

Would I be the laughing-stock of Aline's group again? The girl who took her words to seriously? Or would he break out in laughter right then and there telling me how stupid and impractical I was being?

Instead I was greeted by a reaction I never thought I'd see on Jace Wayland's face. Emptiness. Pure sorrow and regret was plastered over his face, too genuine to be fake.

Why would he be ...concerned about me? Jace has never given me a second glance and yet here he is looking at me like his puppy just died.

"Clary what are you searching on your phone?" _So maybe he hadn't seen it, just lie with what would normally be on your phone._

"Just this... Fanfiction on the _Infernal Devices._ The author killed my favorite character and you can see how I responded." _That had to be a believable lie right? But he was literally right over my shoulder so he could have seen it._

"I don't believe you Clary." Before I had time to react Jace had snatched my phone out of my hand with supernatural speed and reading one of the websites I was on.

"Give me back my phone Jace what I look up on the internet doesn't concern you."

"But it does when you-crap Clary- it matters when you are looking up was to kill yourself!" His voice rose at the end to almost a shout, scaring me to what would come next.

"Well before this week you didn't give two shits about my life and now you are concerned about whether I live or die? Do you see how iconic it is seeing as the person behind my suicidal thoughts is none other Than your girlfriend?" Damn the response that he gave me. I was engraved at the audacity of him. What right did he have to be suddenly concerned with me when he took part in the crime?"Why would you break up with her over me? I'm just a worthless little piece of life that shouldn't be breathing." If I thought the first reaction I though was shocking, this one was off the power grids.

Jace had pure empathy written all over, and had his molten gold eyes fixed in an intense gaze with mine.

"I did it because I know exactly what you are going through, the feeling that no one in the world care about you, that everyone would be better off without you." How did Jace of all people sum up what I was feeling in one sentence? That kind of depth and empathizing only comes from first hand experiences, ones that scar you for life.

"The only way you would know what I am going through is if you experienced it your self, and I am betting you did. If you are expecting me to spill out all my misery then you better to the same."

An interrupting ringing echoed through the halls, signifying the end of lunch

"Not now." He said in a nervous voice, glancing around as if someone was going to come out of the shadows and shoot him. "Meet me at the bleachers afterschool if you want my story. All I can say now is this: you are not a worthless person and you deserve to be on this planet and should. Don't give up your life over the words or someone who never sees things right." With that he hurried away leaving me dumbfounded in all me teary eyed glory.

He left me with a choice.

Die, and be forgotten off the earth without anything.

Or, live another day and hear what someone else went through.

The choice was mine, but the burden of making the right choice was weighing down on my shoulders.

I will live another day, and show everyone that I am not useless.


	12. Jace's Story

**So here's the thing. I was thinking about updating this story about everyother day. I start school on the 24th so I don't know how that will affect my schedule but I hope I can still update frequently. Also check out my otherr story Plague.**

 **Guest-Well Jace does break up with her, and everyone deos want Clary to show up hot**

 **FairyFlare-I love how mch you like my story, adn I am overjoyed that Jace broke up with Clary. As for Simon... only time will tell**

 **WinxFan1066-Thanks I'll try**

Clary POV

Walking to the bleachers after school, was by far the most nerve racking experience I'd ever encountered. And I hadn't even gotten there!

Why am I even going, should I go in the first place? It's only sensible, Jace knows basically your entire story but you know nothing of his. Not to mention he is probably the only person in the world who thinks I'm not a waste of space.

All the reassurance didn't help one bit when I actually reached Jace. Sitting there with his hair slightly ruffled, posture calm and relaxed. How could he be so comfortable when I am about to faint of anxiety. _Well I'm not taking another step!_ Carefully I stepped back, trying my best not to make a sound.

"Clary where are you going?" Jace had somehow spotted me and he had crept up behind me. I mean who is that quiet?

"I just... a... forgot a book at my locker... for... uh... history." I stuttered out making it more than obvious that I was lying.

"Right so are you naturally that bad at lying or did my amazingness give you a loss of words?" Jace had switched back to his conceited attitude that I despised. A clear sign to leave.

"Well if the purpose of me meeting you was so that you could gloat about yourself then I am going to go."

"Wait Clary I didn't mean it like that. Please just stay." How could someone's emotions change from relaxed to arrogant to worried? I mean come on!

"I can't Jace I can't talk about this just please let me go." I said, struggling to get out of the grip that Jace had on my wrists.

"Look Clary we don't have to talk about... that, but at least let me tell you how messed up my life is. I promise it will make you feel better."

"Fine." I caved. "But if you start talking about today I am out of here.

"So where to begin, how about the fact that my last name isn't actually Wayland." He began, while leading us back to the bleachers. _Wait what? Did that mean Jace was adopted?_ "And yes I am adopted if you were wondering. My father killed a couple months before I was born in a car accident. Then my mother passed away in labor. Michael Wayland adopted me and raised me as his own." _That was sad and all, but it's not like he was abused so why is this supposed to make me feel better?_ I mean don't get me wrong that's tragic and all, but does he know about being all alone in this "great big world".

"Now I know you are wondering why I made such a big deal out of this, but you haven't heard the whole story." Jace had successfully piqued my interest. "I stumbled upon an old collection of letters in Michael's office one day. Letters that were addressed to me." _Wait what?_ "Apparently my parents had wrote me letters while my mother was pregnant with me. Most of them were about how excited they were to have a child, how they would be such a happy family, they had just prepared the nursery for me, etc.

"But the last letter was covered in tears, almost illegible. My mother had wrote it when she found out that my father-Stephen Herondale- had died. She wrote that he had gone to the store to buy something _for me_. Celine-my mother-said that she would still love me. She never thought she'd die." Jace's voice was trembling now, he was in the weakest state I had ever seen him. "The reason that both of my parents died... was because of me. I tore apart what was such a happy family. If anyone is a waste of life it's me."

"Jace, they didn't die because of you. It was just the wrong place and the wrong time. You aren't a waste of life. You have a ton of friends, are QB for the school's football team. Everyone has the tragic events that happen in their life and that was yours. You can't beat yourself up about it." I had no idea where those words had come from. I just couldn't stand seeing him so down. That was it...

"How do I know that you aren't just lying to me?" But I could tell be the small smile on his face that I had said the right thing.

"You've seen how bad I am at lying haven't you?"

"That's an understatement. If you could get one person in the world to believe a lie that you told I would die of shock."

"Take that back!" I exclaimed, punching him softly in the shoulder.

"I think you'll have to punch a little harder." That earned him another punch, but we both knew I didn't mean it from the laughter escaping from both of us.

A text from my mom interrupted us, earning a sigh from me.

"Well I have to go, my ride's here."

"Bye Red." That's the nickname he gives me? It's on.

"Really Red? Could you be any less original?"

"We'll just have to see what you come up with for me." He retorted, a sly grin spreading across his face.

"See ya later... Goldilocks."

"What! You are not calling me Goldilocks!"

"It's too late Goldy." With that I walked away, quite please with the reaction I got from Jace.

Aline POV

Watching that brat with red hair laugh with _my_ Jace, the pure hatred flowing through me was too large to describe. How could Jace dump me, Aline Penhallow for her a nerdy social outcast. What did she have that I didn't?

I was pretty and popular, she was ugly and out of style. I mean I have everything and she is nothing.

Jace always used to support me in offending her so what changed? I was not stuck-up or whatever he called me.

But one thing was certain. Jace was _mine_.

And Clary was going to pay for this.


	13. Striking up the nerve

**Here is is as promised, but one thing. I wrote this as a google docs with the italics on that, but I am pretty sure that it will not transfer so hopefully the details after will help you identify thoughts. Sorry!**

 **Disclaimer: I own almost nothing, all credit to Cassandra Clare.**

Jace POV

What happened yesterday? Why in the world did I confess my life story to Clary?

I mean just because she's the only person in the world who might be able to understand what I went through doesn't mean that I have to burden her with my life stories right? Remember she is Jonathan's sister and you know what he says about her. That's she's a nerd with no life and she wastes her life away. At least that's what everyone says

Funny how none of that seemed true now that I knew Clary. It was crazy how much that girl had changed my life. In under one week, she had shown me how people truly perceived me, who my ex-girlfriend really was under her "mask", and defied all stereotypes and rumors told about her.

Everyone in the school had their own opinion, but unfortunately everyone's was wrong. People say that she was socially awkward and hardly ever talked. Others thought she was secretly dating Simon Lewis because no one else wanted her. (Well they couldn't be more wrong than that.) Some even went to extremes and said that she had a temper more fiery than her hair, and once attacked Aline out of nowhere.

Most people can base their entire opinion on what other people say, without even meeting the other person themselves. I mean who wants to go through the tedious and troublesome process of having to introduce yourself to that person and hang out with them etc. etc. When you could just listen to what everyone else says and then decide if you like them or not.

And that's what most people do, that's exactly what I did. I went almost 17 years of my life thinking about Clary Fray in the wrong light. I listened to the rumors and misperceived Clary entirely wrong. Before, she was always the nerd who spent too much time reading and was someone who I would hurt (verbally of course) or at least assist in the action with hardly a second glance. But now, she was the girl who had dealt with more than most would in their entire lives. She was strong and confident and everything that I aspired to be.

There was really no denying it. I had a crush on Clary Fray.

 _*time skip*_

There was no denying it, school was torture. Not just the normal way of it's-so-boring-get-me-out-of-here way, but with what went down yesterday.

When I got to school I was greeted by Aline who was in her words "giving me one last chance before I regretted it." Which I turned down of course.

Apparently word had spread and Aline was doing everything in her power to make my life miserable.

My locker was filled with garbage, I was getting pushed and shoved around by the other football jocks, people kept on attempting to trip me, not to mention when I spoke there was always soft snickering behind me. That was all before lunch!

I seriously wanted to change schools, but there was something keeping me here. Someone.

That someone was Clary. Throughout the day I was building up the nerve to ask her out.

What was this girl doing to me? I never ever asked girls out. They always asked me out and I almost always accepted. Why was I getting nervous of all things? She was just a girl and if she said no then so what?

But as much as you want to act like you don't care about her, you actually do. What! No I don't she is just another girl there are over a billion others in the world. But none are quite like her are they?

Head spinning I approached the lunch line looking for a certain red-head.

"Jace are you sure you want to be in that lunch line? There's a peanut sauce and we all don't want you to go to the ER." Aline slyly stated with a malicious glint in her eye.

"It's so nice that you care about my well-being considering the fact that I dumped you." That put her in her place, but I wasn't done yet. "I mean you really must care about me since you practically begged me to take you back." Echoes of "burn" were scattered across the hall, turning Aline's face redder than a tomato.

"What are you talking about everybody loves me and if it's anyone who should be begging it's you!"

"You see just the fact you are telling me that i should take you back means that everything I just said was true. Everyone else may like you but I know who you really are. You are a selfish, caniving, manipulative person who will do whatever it takes to get what she wants." If anyone hadn't been listening before, they were now. But I found who I really cared about, and she was a few yards away looking at me.

"What… what are… you talking about?"

"You know what I mean Aline, like I said you're manipulative. That's probably the only reason that I went out with you and it was the biggest mistake of my life. Never again will I help you into hurting someone or humiliating them." With that I walked over to Clary, but I couldn't ask her now.

"Can I talk to you after school?"

 _*time skip*_

Walking over to the bleachers, i thought my heart would burst with the ferocity of it's beating. Or maybe that was just fear…

"Clary, you came?"

"Is there a reason why I wouldn't?"

"Look Clary I came over here to ask you something." Can I really do this? Just spit it out and get it over with! But what if she says no, I'll be crushed. Not as crushed as if she gets a boyfriend because she didn't know you were interested. With that I ended my mental argument, ready to ask.

"Clary will you go out with me?"

What happened next was unpredictable.

Her face was a mask of shock and disbelief, as if someone had just told her her dog died. There was silence for a moment, broken by her response.

"Jace, I can't." With that She turned in her stiffened posture and left.


	14. The Aftermath

**So I know I promised every other day, but I was thinking about changing that to two times a week, because homework taking up a majority of my time. My thanks to A Fire Without A Flame fro helping me edit this chapter and add what I believe really enhances this chapter. It's also a little longer that normal.**

 **finlizabeth123-Thanks, I will aspire to fufill**

 **KackyK04-Some of it will be explained this chapter, just sit tight**

 **Clary POV**

Confused didn't even begin to describe my current emotions. _Why had Jace asked me out? I mean I'm not pretty, there's nothing special about me, I am just an un-popular nerdy girl with no life._ That's it! Aline must have told Jace to fake-break up with her in an attempt to get me closer and have me spill all my embarrassing secrets.

 _What a jerk! I mean embarrassing someone publicly is one thing, but doing this was in a whole 'nother category of pure villainy and nefariousness is another. A tsunami is a very powerful wave that crashes down on land, most of the time creating a devastating after effect. The demolition caused by this natural disaster takes forever to recover from, and even after recovery happens things will never be the same again._ I should really reinvent myself like Simon did and show him and everyone else up. But if I do that, then I will be no better than the dirt that Simon is. People would think that we were in on it together, I cannot be talked about being associated with anything relating to Simon. Besides Aline would probably spill her coffee on my clothes or something to make sure that everyday I look ugler than before.

What Jace said to me was like a tsunami. I mean it was oblivious what his true intentions were. If he was really dedicated to this plan, he would have waited a little longer or something else. Not to mention that "story" he told himself about his life must have been absolute rubbish. Just an attempt to try and stimulate empathy in me and make me feel pity for him. My fists clench so hard at the thought of him, turning white at the knuckles. But none of that matters because there is no way that I would ever go out with Jace Wayland.

 **Jace POV**

 _Why did I have to say that to Clary? I should have just waited and then asked her. I mean what did she think about me now? I already have the reputation of a player even though I was with Aline for three months. God she probably hates me or despises me. Why was I so dumb! Now there probably no way to be even friends with Clary. That's what surprised me the times I only used girls for the physical part and never really cared about them. To just want to be their... friend at the least is driving me crazy._ Isn't this day going to be great...

* * *

There were once days where I refused going to school. Just the echo of my footsteps against the gleaming white tiles was enough to set me off. The mere sight of another student would send me cowering in fear, I would never feel accepted anywhere in school. Every moment was spent in agonizing torture.

That was nothing compared to today.

I didn't have any classes with Clary, thank the angel, but I still worried about running into her. Not to mention there was the dilemma of Aline and her group. No doubt she would make my life even more miserable than I had imagined. I would probably get the same treatment as Clary.

 _Walk as fast as you can without drawing any attention to yourself. Don't make eye contact with anyone. Go straight to your locker then head to class._ Commands were flashing through my mind quicker than the speed of light. I only had to go to my locker, rid myself of the abundant amount of back-breaking textbooks I had, then go to physics without running into anyone.

Seemed easy enough, but not as easy as I thought.

"Oh Jace!" A weight dropped in my stomach as I realized the atrocious person that voice belonged to.

"Aline I thought that I said we were done."

"But I think exes are allowed to at least talk to each other."

"Fine, what did you come to talk to me about?"

"Oh you don't have to be so mean to me Jace, just because we are over does not mean that you can treat me like that!" Filled with fake sadness and pain Aline had gotten the attention of everyone in the hallway. She even makes me feel a twinge of pain, which turns to anger once i realized what she's done. So that was her game.

"Aline if you are trying to make me look bad don't bother, it's not going to work."

"But it never hurts to try!" She exclaimed, strutting off to wherever she goes.

 _When was this day over?_

o.0.O.0.o

"Jace can I speak to you for a second?" Mr. Starkweather asked of me as I was exiting my math class. _Oh come on! Calculus is my last class and I need to get out of here!_

"What is it Mr. Starkweather?"

"Now I know that you aren't in AP calc, but I do know that you have the grades for it."

"If you are trying to get me to switch classes I don't think my schedule will co-operate with the change in classes."

"Oh I wasn't implying that, I was just going to ask you a question, would you be interested in tutoring a student?" _What? Why do I need to tutor a student? Wait a second, you can put that on a college application and that could give me a better chance at Ohio._

"Sure, but I have football practice and I can't miss that."

"Of course we will find a way to work it into both yours and her schedule so no one misses out on anything." _And hers? So I'm working with a girl._ "Of course you will also receive the tutoring credits from this class, just say the word and I'll sign you up."

"Thanks for the reassurance Mr. Starkweather."

"So would next Monday after school in this classroom work for you?" Practice is on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday so it works out great.

"That would be great."

Clary POV

Well the weekend was a drag. Most times I would spend it at Simon's place but that wasn't an option. _Simon. You have got to stop think about him. What every bond you guys had developed as best friends apparently meant nothing to him and they should mean nothing to you._

But they weren't nothing to me. I missed my best friend. I missed our marvel marathons, enthusiasm over the latest anime and YA books, the boy who used to help me with my math homework after school. Speaking of math, I wasn't doing too well. We happened to have a test last Friday and I was 100% sure I failed. That was proved correct after math class.

"Clarissa can I speak to you?" Ugh was the meanest teacher in the world, and insisted upon calling me by my full name a name my _father_ picked.

"Yes?"

"You know your math skills have always been... lower than average, but the last test was the last straw. You are to have a junior tutor you on math."

 _A tutor? I mean he can't be serious! There is no way I am WAY too depressed to deal with talking to someone else. Not to mention they are probably forced into this and will hate me._

"There has to be another way please-"

"Mine and Mr. Starkweather's decision is final." Was he a teacher or a student?

"In fact you are to be in his room-I-106 in ten minutes for your first session." She finished with a smug grin, one that I wanted to slap off of her face.

"Fine."

o.0.O.0.o

It is no easy task walking-more like sprinting-across the entire campus to arrive to 's classroom. I wonder who my tutor will be? Just please be a serious un-popular girl who likes to get work done and not meddle in my personal life.

Huffing and panting, I come to an ungainly halt in front of the bold letters "I-106 Calculus". Just one door separates me from what could turn out as a great experience, or the most devastating one yet.

Apparently the universe hates me. Because sitting in a seat is not a serious unpopular girl who won't upset me. They are cocky, immature, popular _boy_.

Jace Wayland

 **Review?**


	15. Tutoring Sessions

**So, it's been longer then I wanted. I didn't anticipate so much homework and other time-consuming things this year. Hopefully I will get at least one update a week. I would like to that Fire Without A Flame for the idea of the car. Also a special shoutout to the guest-BrunetteAngel who wrote such a long review, and most of it was constructive cricisim. This is what I love, people helping me write my fanfiction better, so thank you so much for that. I would also like to formally apologize for this chapter, I wrote the last part in 3rd person so it is probably awful.**

 **ashcator2002-Just like the evil queen. I really like that show and had to make the reference**

 **KackyK04-Thanks, hopefully this chapter satisfies**

 **Ella Blackrose-I hope this chapter answers most of your questions, and there might be a prom!**

 **Guest-We will see about that**

 **BrunetteAngel-Thanks again for the great review, I will try to incorperate your tips into my ff**

 **Guest-I know, I love Simon and HATE writing about him this way. And we all have our rants**

 **Guest-I couldn't live without them**

Clary POV

Jace Wayland WAS MY MATH TUTOR! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME I THOUGHT THAT KARMA SHOWED MERCY EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE! _I mean the same boy who was a manipulating, conniving, vindictive, person who attempted to fool me just to use me as revenge for his girlfriend_. I mean was this planned? Was there some sort of way that they knew about my grades and insisted that Jace come here to embarrass and humiliate me to a further extent.

Not to mention there was no way to change this. Jace Wayland was my tutor and I couldn't have been more infuriated.

Jace POV

Clary! She was the one I had to be tutoring! This is great, I can finally make things up with her and ensure that she goes out with me. _Wait what? Why do I care so much about Clary not going out with me? I am a player who doesn't get attached to any girl and that's that. Why should some short-redhead be the cause of my change of heart. Well if this redhead has helped you realize Aline's true nature and that of the world, the girl who you could trust enough with your most tragic backstory, the girl who made your heart smash in two when she cried, and once again when she rejected you. That was Clary Fairchild. I didn't run after her when she turned me down, now I have to make sure history doesn't repeat itself._

Also, There was no way to change the tutoring due to Starkweather's strict rules. I was Clary Fairchild's tutor, and nothing filled me with more joy.

Hodge Starkweather POV

Ahh the tension that rippled through the room. The boy who liked the girl, but had such a bad past that the girl would never like him. It was so enjoyable, seeing the shock turn to joy, then ot dismay when the girl gave him that look of pure fury. But that wasn't all dear _Clarissa_ did. Rage seemed to be radiating off of her body in deadly waves, knuckles clenched so tight that they were going to be and ugly shade of red later, not to forget the sharp piercing eyes that could break glass.

It was all too simple really. All I had to do was give Clarissa so much work she would be running too late for her mom to pick her up since she had another art show tonight. Racing home from the lateness, she will encounter a struggle in route to her house. One she should never wake up from. Not to mention she would certainly be so infuriated with the football player she would be so blinded that she would never see it coming or at least not have time to save herself.

The only thing to do is wait.

Clary POV

Once Mr. Starkweather left, Jace attempted to talk. Attempted.

"Look I am only here to get help in math and that's it. Don't even try to talk about anything else."

"But-"

"No. Now can we get started?" The calm tone of my voice surprised me, I was certain it would be filled with enough rage to kill.

"Fine."

o.0.O.0.o

"The answer is 3"

"No Clary, you forgot that a negative squared is a positive, which means that you have to add one instead of taking it away. The answer is actually five."

I was so fed up with math. I had to spend time doing my least favorite subject, with my least favorite person, and I knew the teasing that would come tomorrow would be my least favorite of all. And I am here so late that I have to walk home! Could life get any worse? All I want to do is go home and fall asleep reading.

Reading. It was what I did to forget. Some people cut, that didn't work for me, others listened to music too loud or drank, I still needed my hearing and was too young. Instead I just read my way out of my troubles. I could picture myself in the place of the protagonist, living in a different world where I had a better life. Each novel was an adventure, a place I was free to make my own choices and be who I really was. It was one of the main reasons I needed glasses, I reading so late in the dark that it ruined my vision. But I would give up my adventures for anything in the world. They are mine as much as Hazel Grace's infinities are to her. (Who gets that?)

"Clary are you listening?" Ugh. I was transporting to a better place where you weren't in it and then you go and bring me out of that state? I couldn't hate him more.

"Yes I was the answer is 5 and that was the last problem so I can finally go." I honestly didn't care how cruel my voice was, anything to get me out of here. But of course someone had to pull me back by the wrist,

"Clary can we please talk?" The hurt in his voice and plastered on his face! Did he take acting classes or something? Just the fact I almost believed he was genuinely hurt was enough to set me off.

"Jace I know that you are faking this entire thing to get dirt on me and share it with the world. You don't have to even try I'm not going to fall for it so you will have to leave empty handed. I don't know how you managed to set this-"

"Is that really what you think of me?"

"It's obvious that you are doing this all for Aline and you are just going to use me so that I spill all my secrets but that is not happening so if you would let me leave that would be great."

"You think that I-you think that I would do that to you?"

"I know who you are Jace, and you will never change." Not waiting for an answer I stormed out of the room.

3rd person POV

The one furious left without a second glance at the boy behind her. Had she turned, she would have noticed how the boy once broken was now shattered. How much her words had injured the boy who was misunderstood. This girl meant everything to him even if he didn't know it.

If the broken boy had really understood the mistakes he made in the past, how they shaped his image. A completely fake image, but his image nonetheless. At least this time he understood his mistake and wasn't letting this girl run away so easily.

But both were blind to the setup that worked perfectly, a setup involving a car ready to speed down a crosswalk the girl was about to cross. She was so caught up in her own anger that she failed to notice what the other had.

A force knocked her to the ground, and darkness overcame the red, concern the blond.

Neither knew this was just the beginning.

That was a cliffie.


	16. White Walls

**So, I think it's been over a week but I've been seriously busy. Hopefully the fact that I care enough to write this on my birthday makes up for it.**

 **KackyK04-glad to hear it, same on McDonald's**

 **ashcator2002-Thank you, and I live for cliffhangers**

 **finlizabeth-Omg thanks so much, I'll try to get a SSimon POV up soon**

 **FairyFlare-I get my writing traits from Cassie! At least this cliffie wasn't as big as COFA**

 **SeraphinaFriar-Gladd to hear it, hopefully this wass worth the wait**

 **Guest-Was the high five for Simon?**

 **Guest- This only explains a small part of it**

 **Omg-Well it's universally impossible not to love TFIOS, and I will see about answering those**

Clary POV:

Pain. In the dictionary described as "the physical feeling caused by disease, injury, or something that hurts the body." Whoever wrote that was never in pain.

In reality it was a searing force that was spread throughout your body, making your very breath hurt. Something that wouldn't let me move, let alone open my eyes.

Painkillers: a drug that decreases or removes pain that you feel in your body. A drug that I needed a lot more of. Did I even have any where I was?

 _Where was I?_

Then it all came flooding back. Detention, Jace, the car, then nothing. What happened? Was I hit by the car? That would explain the pain. Ugh I have to get up and find some answers sitting here like a damsel in distress is not working.

On that cue my eyelids finally lifted, antagonizing pain rippling through me as if they were sewn shut. The transition from darkness to light definitely didn't help my vision or nausea. White walls. Only one place with that-a hospital.

The steady beeping next to me and IV hooked up confirmed that theory. If only those inanimate objects could tell me what happened. But what was the most unexplained was the pressure on my left hand. The gut-wrenching hurt would be payment for getting an explanation.

A hand. A hand that was connected to an arm which lead to... Jace Wayland? (I) Why would that arrogant narcissistic... person be here right now? Wasn't he the reason I didn't see the car?

"Clary?" That sound couldn't have been coming from Jace no way. The voice was... trembling and weak, full of desperation and tiredness. Nothing like the Jace that existed. There was no one else in the room, so it had to be him.

"Are you awake?"

"What happened?" God my voice was almost as bad as his, but I has in a hospital so I had an excuse for the trembling voice.

"All I remember is you storming out of the classroom-" he started, cleverly cutting off his next words by the sharp glare I sent him. "it was my fault really. But I knew that I couldn't just leave you like that so I chased after you, and a car was speeding your way so I tackled you to the ground to prevent you from getting hit." _Had Jace just saved by life? Why would he do that I mean Aline and the rest of them would just be glad that I died-she said so herself. And if I didn't get hit to the ground then why was I here and in so much pain?_

"You're in the hospital because I'm used to taking football players, not high school girls and the ground was harder than grass so I ended up fracturing one of your left ribs and bruising your left shoulder. Sorry about that."

"At least I wasn't hit by a car."

"Look, about what you said yesterday about me only trying to be close to you for Aline, that wasn't true." _Oh no. I am way to tired for this despite being up for less than 5 minutes._

"Jace can we just talk about this later-I'm way too tired."

"I guess so." But the hope that left his voice and depressed looked on his face betrayed him.

"We can talk about this later when I'm feeling better okay?"

"Fine. I'll go call a doctor in to check on you. You do know you've been passed out for almost three days right?" Three days! Was the injury really that bad?

But there was hardly any time to process it, I could already feel my consciousness slipping away.

* * *

The next time I dared open my eyes, I was greeted with hair much like my own.

"Clary are you okay? I've been so worried!" Of course my mom would pick now of all times to finally show interest in my life. I mean she is hardly ever there when I need her, most of the time she just leaves me in "Jonathan's safe hands" which are quite the opposite.

"Mom I'm fine I just want to get out of here." It was true. I had spent way too much time her after... he had finally left and I couldn't handle the memories resurfacing.

Her face darkened, she got the message. "I'll see what I can do but you got hurt pretty badly. Plus someone else has something to say to you."

My brother appeared from the shadows of the room, causing me to wish he went right back in them. _Was he seriously going to mock me now of all times?_

"Hey sis how are you feeling?"

"Fine except for almost being hit by a car." If anything could get me out of this, it was sarcasm

"Jace told me about that, are you seriously okay?" _Was it a new group thing to suddenly be nice to me and then backstab me? What is with these people. Although Jace did save your life..._

"Why would you care in the first place?"

"Mom can you give us some privacy?" Jon asked, glancing at our mother whom I'd forgotten was there.

Once she left, my brother resumed. "Clary I get that I have seemed like the worst brother in the world."

"That's because you are."

"Let me finish. But that was just because they were my friends and I thought that I was doing the right thing. When I first went to Alicante Middle, I met Jace and we became great friends overtime. I thought that what Aline said about you justified my actions, but it was having you almost die that made me realize I that they weren't. Now I'm not expecting you to forgive me, I just want you to consider it. I was wrong the entire time, I let Aline manipulate my thoughts until I hurt my own sister."

With that my older brother walked away, leaving me dumbfound and wondering-Was that genuine, or a trick?


	17. Another Chance?

**I would like to apologize for the wait. It's been almost a month! I don't want to give excuses but I didn't think that 7th grade would be so busy with clubs and events and studing but it took me by suprise. I'll try my best to keep on updating as frequently as I can. I dedicate this chapter to the guest who left me the AMAZING review.**

 **Carissa Herondale- LOVE the name, and I'll try!**

 **Mrs. Eatonlove-thank you so much, but in real life I am the least sympathetic person so I really don't know how I pulled this ff together**

 **Guest-I'm attempting to, but I literally HAD NO IDEAS**

 **Guest-I cannot thank you enough for your comment, I really love writing fanfiction and knowing that someone likes it as much as you and would even think about comparing it to Cassandra Clare means the world to me. You are the reason that I wrote this chapter today**

Clary POV

A week. I had been stuck in this hel-I mean hospital for a week. Nothing about this place seemed like "the perfect place to relax and get back to full health". Not to mention this was where I came after mom found out about... him.

The punches, screams, scars. Everything that I had spent to long trying to block out came rushing back to me, more descriptive than ever.

 _Flashback_

 _This was the best day ever. The heavens and the earth seemed to shine as it was the beginning of summer before kindergarden. Oh I couldn't wait until I would be able to go to school, and have friends, maybe Jon will show me around?_

 _But the harsh slamming of the door cut off my blithe daydreaming._

 _"CLARISSA GET OUT HERE." Daddy? But why was he being so harsh?_

 _"Yes daddy?"_

 _"I lost my first case tonight and it. Was. Because. Of. You." He shouted in my ear, enunciating each of his words with a punch._

 _"Mommy!" I screamed at the top of my lungs, the pain was like a whip cracking onto my body, breaking every bone._

 _"VALENTINE WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO OUR DAUGHTER!?" Everything was blurry, but even in my current state I could see the fury seething throughout each of them._

 _"This little abomination is the reason that I lost tonight's case. I NEVER lose a case and it is because of her that I have lost my status. SHE HAS TO BE PUNISHED"_

 _"WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THAT YOU CAN HURT CLAY LIKE THAT YOU SICK (insert swear word of choice)" My mother's attempts of prying me out of my father's grip was futile, and to prove his point he shoved me into the fridge with a torturous thump. Right now I was as mobile as a rag doll._

 _"Now you listen to me. You will do what I say and I will do what I want or I will not hesitate to kill Clarissa."_

 _"You are a lawyer, you know that I can turn you in and get you arrested." How quick the mood subsided to the scary-calm voice_

 _"But if you know anything about my job, you would realize that I have many connections. Manny many connections that would never have your case make it to court." He responded with that sly grin of his. The grin that gave him the upper hand, changed everything I though I knew about my father._

 _"Okay." My mother's voice was a whimpering whisper, barley audible. But that one word changed my life forever_

 _End flashback_

So many things had changed that night. I can hardly stand talking to my mother even though she tries so hard. I just shut her out. Everything reminds me of the past. I lost the man I once called dad, got a mother broken by what she once thought was love, and grew apart from a brother I thought I knew.

Did I know my brother?

He told me that everything that he did... was a misunderstanding?

Was he telling the truth? Did Aline really manipulate him so that she believed that I was worse than she ever was? There was once a time when I considered Jonathan my best friend, but that was before. I can't help the longing of what I should have had. How having Jon as a real brother rand not the one that he has been to me. If I could just have one day when wit would all be right... Maybe I could have that future someday, but those drams were smashed a long time ago and are what they are now, just dreams. Fancy little whims that once brought such promise. Once did. Before everything happened.

Before my abusive father, depressed mother, bipolar brother, and a life rid of drama.

I used to be able to live my life without worrying about what terrors awaited tomorrow. But that time existed so long ago, I can't even remember a time like that.

And then there was Jace.

Jace

What was with him. First he hates me and always makes my very existence miserable, and now he is all sentimental and kind. But that was all just an act that the put on with Aline. Was it really? Could I have been wrong this entire time?

I mean he had shared his life story with me, and the shattered look in his eyes was self-explanatory that he was crushed. That could mean he could help me get over the aching feeling that I get inside. Then he did seem truly concerned when he saw my phone with the suicide possibilities. And he apparently stayed by my side while I was unconscious, not to mention he practically saved me from getting hit by that car.

No matter what, I couldn't forget what he had done. All the tears shed in secret, humiliation that coursed through my veins each day, then how everyone had turned against me. It had taken him so long to see what Aline was making him do was so wrong, if he does think that way,

I was at a crossroad. Put my trust in someone who could potently make or break me. Or I could continue where I was now and never trust anyone again. Never find th elite joy in having a friend. Never let someone in.

Take a risk and risk it all, or play it safe but suffer the consequences.

Try something new and uncover a discovery, or never make another adventure.

Create a path that could result in what I've always wanted, or continue along a path full of solitude.

Everyone wanted me to give them a chance.

And maybe I will

Just maybe.

 **So that was mainly a filter chapter.**


	18. My Apology AN

So here's the thing: I am SO SO SO SO SO SO SOOOOO SORRY for not updating in forever. May my heart be stomped on by Izzy's stilettos and be cast in Tartarus. What happening is: I know the entire plot that I way that I want everything to go, but I can't come up with chapters or ideas in between. I know it is a lot to ask, but if I could ask for idea or plots that you guys want me to include in the story. I am just going through writer's block and I can't write anything. Sorry again for not updating but I don't know what to write. Ideas?

-The fangirl who is EXTREMELY sorry


	19. Ever Stopped To Think?

**So... it's been a while. Is it too late to say sorry? Apparently my plans of me not having a life and being able to update frequently didn't work out as well as I hoped it would. Just know that I'm trying to get up chapters as frequently as possible (just read the an). With that being said, thank you to winter's cry my amazing beta for helping me come up with this chapter. Also a huge thanks to Emma Blackthorn, Liz399, and guests for reviewing and sending me great PM's that contained great plot ideas. Well here it is:**

Clary POV

It was a week since I got out of the hospital, but today was my first day back at school. And let me tell you-make-up work is a b****. That was one of the reasons I couldn't go back to school.

I wish I could stay at home longer.

At home I can at least pretend that everything is alright and that I am mentally stable. Where I can try to ignore Jon and his confession and Jace with his lies.

 _Are they lies?_

I don't know what to believe nowadays. Is anything ever as it seems anymore?

"Clary can I talk to you" My mom asks, pushing the door to my room open, then closing it.

"Sure, what about?"

"Well as you know you have been getting a lot better and catching up with your schoolwork and soon you will have too-"

"Actually I have a little more work to catch up on for math so can I stay out a little longer?" I cut her off nervously, at school I'll face reality and have to get out of my little bubble of oblivion.

"Okay here's the thing that I need to talk to you about." She says with a... pained look in her eye. "I know that something is wrong. You used to love going to school as a little girl and now you are making up excuses to get yourself out of it. What's going on? _As if I would tell her the truth. Oh mom, I mean I've just been mentally tortured since I can remember and if you think I was every excited about school then you are obviously a terrible mother._

Since I couldn't tell her the truth, that left one option, to lie.

"Mom everything's fine at school, I just genuinely feel bad and I don't want to go back there and fail a test because I'm not feeling good. Do you want my grades to suffer?" The grades thing should get to her, she always cares about them.

"Look I am your mother and I know that something is wrong do just tell me Clary!" _The one time she acts like a mother is now! You have got it be kidding me!"_

"It's nothing just leave it at that and leave me alone." Any sweetness was sucked out of my voice, replaced by hostility and fury.

"Young lady do not take that tone with me I am your mother and I-"

"You what? You know what's best? Just because Valentine ruined your life does not mean that you can ruin mine and you are never there when I need you so what makes you think that you can be a mother now? All you've been doing is wallowing in self pity of what he did and what makes you think that I would let you in now?" All the anger and rage that I had been feeling, all the confusion and loneliness came out, and I knew I had crossed the line.

There was the momentary peace of silence, then it all went downhill. Expecting full on yelling, a mother enraged beyond belief, I received a much worse reaction.

"I tried, I really did." The pained whisper form her mouth, hardly audible. Then she silently left, closing the door behind me with silent tears streaming down her broken face. Then the reality of what I did came crashing down.

There's two rules in our house. Don't get arrested, and never under any circumstances bring up the scum that was my father. My mom could hardly live with herself. A man who gave her two children, loved her with all his rotten heart, and he broke her. Both of them had been so in love that they had two different reactions. There was my mom who was lovestruck and everyday was a honeymoon.

Then there was Valentine. Stress got to him... and he betrayed us all. He was so blinded by love that he thought it would handle anything and last forever. He was wrong.

I still see the longing and agony in my mother's face every time she remembers him. Wishing for the man she loved to return as he once was, and the torture of loving a man who changed into something vile.

You _never_ bring up that man in this house.

And I broke that unwritten rule.

Jocelyn POV

She was right. About every part.

The first couple years that he was gone I was nothing. Merely a shell that felt no emotions but sorrow. I hardly payed attention to my kids. I was drowning in my own self pity, and left my own children on their own.

After that I tried to get over him. But it never worked. I signed up for numerous online dating sites, trying to forget him. But I never made it out the door as it's impossible to forget someone so important no matter how hard I tried. I attempted to reconnect with old friends. But both of us had the same friends and every single one of them brought back old memories that scarred even deeper.

And it never got better. Sure I finally got my career back on track, but art was an escape. I was known for my meaningful pieces, and that's because I put everything into my art. I channeled all the frustration and solitude into my paintings. I only helped myself.

All along I never considered how this might have affected Jon and Clary. Never tried to put myself in their shows an pd think about how it would be to grow up without a father to guide them, and it was practically like they grew up without a mother.

I couldn't even recognize when my own daughter was hurting just as deep as I was. Maybe more. If I was a real mother I would have realized the signs and ensured that she could confide in me. Instead I let her drift away. That's why her words hurt. It was because everyone one of them was true.

I was a terrible mother.

And with every last breath in my body I was going to change that fact.

 **Review?**


	20. Do you believe me?

**Well it's been almost a month since I updated. The chapter is below but if you want to know why:**

 **I am in 4 clubs at school. It might not seem like much, but me tell you my three main ones**

 **Speech-I am a proconsul and hve to constantly coach people for presentations and that takes up a ton of my lunches a dearly in the morning**

 **Robotics-Everyday afterschool from 3-5**

 **Science Oly-I am in 4 events, and that means that I have to constantly study them and take practice tests and make meetings**

 **I also volunteer in biology for a hour a week.**

 **And this week has been CRAZY because Two tournaments this Saturday, on is for robotics and the other for sci oly, and combined it's over 12 hours long.**

 **So even though I'm only 12, I bascially have almost no free time so I have a hard time updating. Sorry bout that! I try, but time slips away.**

 **So that's my rant-here's the story:**

Clary POV

Nothing, then everything. I'm standing alone in a forest. Nothing in my surroundings but trees - if you could call them that. More like massive objects that are looming above my head, and their shadows so long and dark I can hardly see the floor. But what I can tell is it is the counterpart of the trees. Thick moss sinking my feet into it with every step, a murky swamp green.

Everything about this place I am in screams "danger go away!" But I can't leave. Can't go away form the tranquility that have found. I'm finally alone. Nothing but peace surrounds me. Then it's all gone.

"Freak"

"Loser"

"Nobody"

Words that's all I can hear now. Every shred and safety of this... forest has left. The words are right in front of me now, swirling in front of my face and being called out by a high pitched girl. A voice that only belongs to one person.

 _Aline._

Revealing herself from the tree she was hiding behind, all she does is speak.

Shaking and squirming I can't escape from the binds that hold me. Every movement makes the ropes around my body tighten. Then she's growing taller along with the trees.

I'm falling. Somehow I'm stuck in quicksand and sinking fast.

With that menacing sneer of hers, Aline leans over, and says one last word.

"Worthless"

Nothing is all that remains.

RING RING

Gasping I take in what surrounds me. A tree, the blue sky, and the building behind me. I have to be in school? _It was all a dream?_ I can't even find peace in sleep now! The one place I don't have to think or process what's happened to my life.

What day is it? December 1st.

One week since I fought with my mom and ruined everything with her.

Two weeks after I was out of the hospital

Three weeks since Jace saved me from the car

Four from when I trusted someone and it was all a scam

A month from when I lost my best friend, and my life began falling apart at the seams.

 _Simon_

 _RING RING_

Great. Lunch is now over and I'm stuck going to my least favorite class. Math.

o.0.O.0.o

"Clary can I talk to you for a minute?" _You know I kinda have more important things to do then to talk you Mr. Starkweather._

"Sure."

"Your grade in this class has not improved on bit, in fact the test we just took was the worst one for you." _Well I was oh I don't know IN THE FREAKING HOSPITAL SO I DIDN'T HAVE TIME TO DO MATH!_

"I was in the hospital, I just got back today so I haven't exactly had time to study this class or any."

"While that is true, the lest that you could do was show up to your tutoring. Mr. Wayland will be here in a couple minutes today as it is Tuesday and that is your tutoring day. And no protesting, if you don't get at least a B on the next quiz, then either have tutoring more often or fail this class and stay back a year. We wouldn't want that now would we?"

"No we wouldn't. I'll wait in here, but could it be possible that I could get another tutor?"

"I'll look into the matter, but for now just keep on with Mr. Wayland." He finished with that menacing little sly grin as he exited the room.

o.0.O.0.o

"Clary?" _I really can't get another tutor?_

"So what are we going to do first? Mr. Starkweather gave me back my test and he wants-"

"Actually I wanted to talk to you first before we started, look I would never want to get close to you for the sake of hurting you and I know that I might have a rough past I would never hurt you." The pain in his eyes, hunched stance, the voice with sadness just pouring out. It had to be a trick. No way that Jace could actually want to go out with me or anything real.

"Why can't we just work on the math, I can't fail this class."

"No Clary I need you to believe me, forgive me for everything that I've done, what I've let Aline do to you. Please."

"Jace I'm not one to-"

"Can I at least prove myself to you then? Can I show you that I'm a better person. That what you said to me a couple weeks ago actually changed me for the better Clary. Just give me one more chance, that's all I want. A chance."

 _Is this Jace or Aline's minion? He did break up with her and I haven't seen him hanging out with that group anymore so everything that he said is probably true. But he's a heartbreaker-they get close to you and leave you crying when their done. But all he wants is a chance..._

"If I don't forgive you, will you leave me alone?"

"If that's what you want, then yes."

"Fine. But one chance."

Maybe I could forgive Jace one day, _one day._

Simon POV (by request)

"What's Clary doing back I thought she was still in the hospital?" _Clary was in the HOSPITAL! She hates hospitals and they do more harm than healing form what she's gone through. She would never agree to go to a hospital unless she was forced to or it was serious. WHAT HAPPENED TO CLARY!?_

"Aline why was Clary in the hospital in the first place?"

"Why do you care? Missing you old friend and you want to crawl back to her miserable little feet ?"

"No, I just want to know what put her there and who I can thank." _The lie was bitter coming off my tongue, but the grin Aline was what I needed._

"I don't know exactly, something about a car and something happened to one of her ribs and shoulders."

"Thanks, I'll see you tomorrow."

Clary, the girl who put all her trust in me and I in her. Well, expect for the fact that I'm in love with her because I wouldn't be able to accept rejection. That's exactly what happened and I did wrong. I always helped her on her homework, especially math, she can make heads or tails of that-now how was she doing in her studies.

Clary was my everything and I let her go. I pushed her aside. Instead of embracing the fact that she doesn't reciprocate my feelings, I turned against her. I became friends with her moral enemy and told her secrets. All I've been doing is bring down Clary. She doesn't have any other friends beside me, now what is she doing? Everyone is against her and there is not one to support her.

I've left the person I live most defenseless in on of the worst times.

 _What have I done?_

 **I finally did another Simon POV**


	21. All I Need Is One More Chance

**So... It's been a really long time since I've updated. I just haven't really had any inspiration, and I just got my first laptop today and I'm very happy. The keyboard definetly makes typing easier (I used to use my school Ipad), so I am hoping to make longer chapters, slowly but surely getting longer. Here it is:**

 **Simon POV**

What have I done?

I made a HUGE mistake. I left my best friend when she needed me the most. Instead of dealing with the fact that she doesn't love me like I love her, I completely ditched her. I became the person she hates and despises. I left her alone in a dark and depressing time. She almost got killed by a car or something and I wasn't there to save her!

I have to go back to my best friend, and get her to forgive me, no matter what it takes.

—

I never thought I'd be doing this, but I guess I am. Standing in front of Clary's house, ready to knock on her door and beg for her forgiveness.

 _Knock knock_

Bright red hair, dull green eyes, not the tallest, it's… Clary's mom?  
"Miss Fray? Is Clary here?"

"Not right now, her teacher emailed me and told me that she's in tutoring right now for math with another student, I think it's that Herondale kid." _WHAT?_ I was always the one to help Clary with her homework and finish it when she falls asleep on the couch. Now her mortal enemy is helping her with math because I wasn't there. _I wasn't there._

"Do you know when she's going to be back?"

"Within the hour, Simon could you come inside for a little bit?"  
"Sure," but I was anything but sure in this situation.

"I was wondering why you didn't come over when Clary was in the hospital, or when she got released? Did you have something else going on?" _So Clary_ ** _was_** _in the hospital and I_ ** _wasn't_** _there to help her through it._

"Yeah I had to do a lot of other stuff… and my phone dead so I didn't get a text from Clary…"

"Okay Simon," she said while shutting the door, "I want the truth. What's going on with my daughter and you. You are _always_ there for Clary, she would have called your mom if your phone was really dead. You're always around at least twice a week helping Clary with her homework and just hanging out. Now she has to get tutored, and aren't you a tutor as well? And since when have you dressed like that? Simon what's going on?" _So do I tell her that I betrayed Clary and lost all her trust, or can I find some way to lie about this?_

"Well you see Miss Fairchild, ah screw it. I made a huge mistake with Clary and I basically ruined everything between me and her. I came over here to grovel at her feet for forgiveness."

"So it's only now that you realize what you did Simon" This time the redhead speaking wasn't Miss Fairchild.

 **Clary POV**

After I had agreed to give Jace a chance, he really stepped up his game. He was insanely nice, generous, and was really patient when I didn't understand something. I even tested him on it.

 **(Btw I'm in seventh grade and I can't take advance math classes until next year, so this problem isn't at their grade level, and probably wrong, but oh well!)**

"So the answer's 5x is more than three right?"

"No Clary, when you are dividing by a negative number, the inequality sign flips."  
"So then then this is graphing it correctly?" I gestured, at my incorrect graph.

"Not that either, because for negative numbers, the number line is switched. and you have to finish the final step, which is dividing both sides by 5, so the answer would be x3/5." He responded with a strained voice and pink face. It was almost too easy…

"But why do you have to do all of that work it's so complicated. And what would you do for the graph? Would you graph integers or fractions?"  
"Fractions, and negatives are different on the number line so graphing the circle and line are switched Clary!"

"Oops."  
"You know what, I think that we're done for today."

"Alright then see you tomorrow then," I replied ready to walk out the door.

"Clary do you have a ride home?"  
"Actually not today, I think Jon was supposed to give me a ride but I'm guessing he forgot."  
"Or it could be that we have football practice today that doesn't end for another hour or so."  
"I have to wait here for an entire hour? I actually finished all my homework?" The one time!

"How about I drive you home?"  
"I think I'll wait."  
"Clary, I need to earn your forgiveness and for that I need a chance." Okay I'm giving you a chance now, to get out of this conversation before you regret it.

"Well sorry if less then a week ago you were constantly tormenting me and now we have to be all buddy-buddy." The dejected look in his eyes was there in less then a second, why does he have to make this so hard for me?"

"Clary I promise to never hurt you like that again, I will make sure that if anything I protect you and that I've changed for the better. I used to only care about myself and always go along with whatever Aline made me do. Now I realize what I've done was selfish and terrible and just wrong. You're the one who made me realize all of that Clary. No I'm not doing this out of guilt towards you or anything else. I feel that we've never met the real version of each other and I would really like to know you better, if you would let me."

"Okay." Then the hope is back in his bright golden eyes.

"Then let's get in this car and take you home!" Jace hollers, pumping his fist in the air. Then there's a smile. A _real_ smile, not the normal smirk that's always been on his face. A genuine smile. Maybe I did make the right decision. I can only hope I'm right.

—

"We have arrived at your destination milady." Jace says with a goofy smile, opening my door. Jace Wayland a gentlemen. Who would have thought?  
"Why thank you Mr. Wayland."

"So when do you want me to tu-"

"…with Clary," that voice, why is Simon in my house? "and I basically ruined everything between me and her. I came over here to grovel at her feet for forgiveness."

"So it's only now that you realize what you did Simon" _I was his best friend for years and it takes him weeks to figure out what he did wrong? I was at an all time low in my life and he just sat on the side with Aline, laughing and mocking me. He even fed her information to use against me!_

"Clary." From that one word, I can instantly tell everything that he's feeling. The regret, hurt, sorrow, misery. We've always been able to read each other in a moments glance. Still processing it he rushes over to me, encasing me in a bone-breaking hug. "Clary."

"Simon, air."  
"Sorry! Look Clary I am so sorry for what I did. It was out of rage and I didn't think it through at all and I made you suffer, I wasn't able to help you get through your injury, or do any of the things I'd promised to do since we were kids and I am so so sorry for what I did, and I'll spend the rest of my life asking for your forgiveness." _Do I forgive him for everything that he did wrong? I mean what he did was terrible, something I would never even think about doing, but I can't hate Simon. I've been trying to but it never works. Whether I like it or not, I need him._

"Simon what you did was wrong, and I really really want to hate you, but I can't. That doesn't mean that you're off the hook though, I still want you as a friend but only as a friend until I can fully forgive you."

"Of course Clary I fully understand and thank you so much for giving me another chance. I promise that I won't ever betray you like that again." There's the light in his chocolate brown eyes I haven't seen in a while.

It was nice having my best friend back, as just a friend. If only my mom and Jace hadn't witnessed the entire thing…

 **I hope it was worth the wait, I just had to have Simon realize what he did, because I realized that people don't normally do that but he loved her and it all went downhill. I just really needed to do that. I should be updating more frequntly!**


	22. Can I Mend The Bond?

**What? An update the day after I posted something? I told you the new laptop was inspriation. I'll try to update much more frequently, but I'm using a couple chapters to try and go more into the backstories of characters, and really explaining their role, and their flaws. No Mary Sues, at least I'll try to. Also, to the guest who commented on ch. 18 asking to be my best friend. PM me! I am a crazy fangirl who loves talking to other book lovers. But don't bring up Will Herondale unless you want me to go into a hour rant on why he is the MOST AMAZING FICTIONAL CHARACTR.**

 **Jocelyn POV**

 _What had that boy done to my daughter that caused her to not even talk to him. Clary can never even stay angry at him. Not even when he embarrassed her in front of the entire school!_

Flashback

 _"Simon leave me alone I don't want to talk to you!" My daughter was racing towards the car, heavy tears streaming down her pale cheeks in waterfalls. My motherly senses we put on overdrive, and I was jumping out of the minivan that would sonly be replaced._

 _"Simon just leave her alone. Haven't you done enough already?" There was Jon with his shining platinum hair, every glance at it was a stab to the heart. A reminder of a man that once brought me so much joy. The divorce was still fresh in my mind, along with the marks that would always remain. They were so close now, Jon was so protective of her. I could only hope that he would help her though her past when I'm not around._

 _Both of them hopped in the van, Clary slamming the door harshly. Guess I had to just drive._

 _"Give it a little bit Simon, I'll see you later." That made the kid feel a little better right? Simon was like my own son and he was crushed. What happened anyway?_

 _"Clary what happened?" I asked while shifting the car into drive._

 _"Simon told the entire class that I liked Sebastian Verlac!"_

 _"Well do you?"  
"No I don't! I was talking about him during art because he was so annoying and he called me little red riding hood! Then I told him to leave me alone, then Simon thought that he was teasing me because he liked me. Then he thought that I liked him! He screamed it in front of the entire class and now the entire grade probably thinks that I like him!" So much drama for fourth grade._

 _"Clary I'm sure that Simon was just kidding about it and that he didn't mean it. Besides it will all blow over soon. Did he at least apologize?"  
"That's all he did after school."  
"At least he apologized and was too close to Clary that I couldn't throw a punch at him."  
"Jon! Don't go punching my best friend!"  
"What he did was wrong Clary."  
"But I'm sure that it was an accident and he seemed really sorry!"_

 _"See Clary even you agree that what Simon said was an accident. How about tomorrow you say that you forgive him and go back to being best friends." Jon was a clever one with his words. I feared for his teachers sometimes._

 _The next day Clary and Simon were back and running as best friends, and the lie blew over eventually_

End flashback

Simon and Clary just couldn't bear to be apart. And from what I can tell, this has been going on for a while. _How could I not have noticed what my daughter was going through?_ She was right a week ago when she said that I was only obsessed with my own self pity after Valentine was gone. I could hardly even talk to my son now from the resemblance that he had. _You're hardly even a mother anymore Jocelyn. You couldn't even make sure that your own daughter is alright. And when was the last time that you held a conversation with your son?_

I promised myself that I would get my act up and restore the bonds with _both_ my children. I have to do this.

Whatever it takes

 **Clary POV**

To most it would have seemed like I was giving Simon a second chance. It was like that but I wasn't _that_ forgiving. It's like when you're on probation in school. Anything wrong and you don't get a second chance.

Just like my situation with Jace. Speaking of Jace…

"Yeah so Clary I'll see you some other time for tutoring." Jace awkwardly said as he scratched his neck. _Not awkward at all…_

With that he walked out the door, one less person to deal with.

"So Clary would you like me to leave you alone to talk with Simon?"

"That's alright I think that me and Simon got everything settled." Even though I "forgave" him, The thought of having to stay with him longer than absolutely possible was not too appealing.

Of course the look Simon had in his eyes was pained, but I needed time to process all of this.

"I'll see you tomorrow then Clary."

—

"Clary can I talk to you for a minute?" My mom's gentle knock and kind voice a reminder of all the lying I've done in the past month. _When did my life turn into this?_

"Sure."

"So after what happened with Simon and what you said to me earlier, please don't interrupt, I realized something. You were right Clary. This entire time I've been neglecting you and your brother and I've been… so so unbelievable selfish." Her voice broke, and a collection of tears poured out from her dim green eyes. "I never should have don that to you, you used to tell me everything and I was always there for you. Now I can't do anything to help you, I couldn't even tell that you were hurting inside. I don't deserve to call yourself my daughter."  
"Mom, I was the one who lied and drifted away from you. This is all my fault." Now I was crying, my bed collecting puddles of tears.

"Clary I promised to never shut you out and go back to the shell of a person you were before if you would just forgive me and let me be the _mother that you deserve_." It seems that everyone needs a second chance today… But this time it was what I had been hoping for for years. For my mother to finally wake up and be who I needed her to be.

"And I won't shut you out and lie anymore."  
We embraced, bawling our eyes out. Just like we had many years ago thinking about the man that ruined everything…

 **Funny story, the same thing happened with me and one of my best friends in 3rd grade (the flashback scene) in art, but it was with this actor. I was only mad at him until after school.**


	23. You're Not Off The Hook Just Yet

**So I'm revising some of my chapters and getting rid of all the (I)s and (B) stuffs. So I have to ask you guys: same length chapters with updating as often as I can, or longer chapters (you can choose the length), but the updates will take longer. Your choice!**

 **Clary POV**

When I said that I wouldn't completely shut my mom out, I meant it. She was finally moving on from my father, and she could finally be what I had always wanted. That didn't mean that I have to tell her _everything_. Don't get me wrong, I meant what I said. I'm just not at that point where I can trust her with all my secrets-no one could ever reach that point of trust with me. Mom knew that, and the same was with her. But that didn't mean that she would let me off the hook with Simon. She kept on pestering me about what happened until one day I finally cracked.

 _Flashback_

 _"_ _So now that all your friends are back in order, at least that's what I think from what happened with Simon right?"_

 _"_ _Mom for the last time I don't feel like talking about him. Everything's fine and I need to finish my math homework." I had actually been getting a lot better at math. Jace was a surprisingly good tutor._

 _"_ _I know that you don't want to but I really want to help and if you can't talk to Simon then you have no one to confide in."_

 _"_ _Right now I don't need someone to talk to, I need to finish this assignment so I can move onto the next class's homework."_

 _"_ _But I just want to hel-"_

 _"_ _Look mom I get that now you want to get back in my life and make up for lost time, but not like this. If I wanted to talk to someone I would have and that's that now please just leave me alone!" My face must have resembled a tomato and the heavy breaths must have made it look like I ran a mile._

 _"_ _I get it, I won't bring it up again." With that my room door was shut once again, leaving me to attempt tranquility in the silence._

 _End flashback_

Since then my and my mom had settled into a comfortable silence.

"Hey Clary!" I was brought out of my mind by none other than Simon. Although Simon seemed to be trying even harder than Jace to prove himself, because he knew that I hadn't fully forgiven him. What I said last week was mainly so my mom and Jace would think that's everything was perfectly alright and not bring up the topic. Wrong assumption on my part! Simon pretty much left the populars, and the fact that he did it for me made Aline upset! If looks could kill…

"Hi Simon" I replied, stepping out of my brother's car. Another weird thing that happened, I can now ride in my brother's car. He's been a lot kinder to me, playing it off that it's because mom's breathing down his neck about not being nice enough to me, but I know this has to relate to what he said in the hospital. Although his one rule for me was: don't let anyone know.

There was a lie to cover up any kind of compassion that he would show towards me, the car being that mom forced him, not teasing me because he "wasn't in the mood for it" or he "forgot something in class". But he was slowly but surely becoming the brother that he had been all those years ago to me. Our family was going through a slow, but steady, drive down recovery road.

"So what's your first class?"

"Do you even need to ask?"

"Touché Fairchild."

"So-" I was cut off from completing my sentence when a heavy force knocked me over.

"Hey I didn't see you there Clary." Of course it was Sebastian Verlac of all people that ran into me. Typical

"Look man I get that you might be mad at me or something but that doesn't mean that you need to take it out on Clary." Although me and Simon still weren't on the best of terms, he finally took back the role he once had.

"I didn't run into you on purpose Clary, I just didn't see you."  
"So now the short jokes. Are you really going to pull that on me Sebastian?" Nothing I haven't heard a thousand times or more.

"I didn't see you and that's the truth. Honestly I don't get why Aline has such a big problem with you anyway. I mean I can't find anything to hate about you." That giant lie of a statement was followed by the signature player smirk almost all boys wore when they were overconfident, cocky, (insert word of choice).

"You have got to be kidding me. Are you seriously pulling that on me?"  
"Hey," he replied in that annoying arrogant voice, trying to sound all sweet and innocent, but I knew Sebastian all to well for that to work on me. "It really was an accident. You can believe it or not." With that he left me perplexed with one thing in that conversation, except for the short joke-or-was-it-a-joke there were no insults thrown my way.

"Well that wasn't confusing or weird at all." There was a real grin, if only that could make me smile like it used to.  
Time for another day of torture.

 **Aline POV**

"Well did it work?"  
"Of course not what did you expect for her to fall into my arms?"  
"No, but do you think that you at least made a small impact or anything that we can work with?"  
"Maybe, but it's definitely going to take time. Clary isn't like all the other girls in the school. But within the month I'll have her in the palm of my hand."  
"Good we need to terminate her, she needs to pay. Goodbye." With that Sebastian walked away, leaving me alone in the storage room.

Clary was going to regret ever talking to my Jace. She poisoned his mind and made him think that he was too good then me. That I was actually doing something wrong. Clary always makes me second place at everything in the world and I am done with it. I am sick and tied of always being stuck the in her shadow.

Even when I have everyone wrapped around my finger yet she still managed to ruin the one thing she hadn't touched yet.

 _My boyfriend_

Ex-boyfriend now because of her. I tried everything.

At first I was nice to her, then she ruined my hair.

I try to ruin her outfit, but the food ends up on me.

I attempt to ruin her confidence, but I get caught mid-way.

I studied for hours for that spelling bee, to finally find something that I would be able to be better at there than, she won that too. I wanted something, just one thing, _one damn accomplishment_ that I can tell my parents about and finally be proud of.

What I've always dreamed of.

Too bad it seems impossible.

 **It was never my intention to have Aline be the complete villain just because, Aline is more then that and a character that I really liked in the books. I just needed someone to fit this role, but I hope it's all explained.**


	24. Strange Events

**So it's been longer than I wanted it to. Trust me I am trying to get ideas through but I seem to be getting a blank. Luckily most of my events have dimmed down/stopped because we didn't make nationals-robotics- or I didn't make the state team-Science Olympiad. Hopefully I will have more time to write. Also, big thanks to ashcator2002 for giving me an amazing idea that let to this chapter, while the idea is not used in this chapter, there is a slight buildup. Also thanks to winter's cry for making me put in the Aline part this chapter.**

 **And 109 reviews! EEEEEEEEEEEEE! By the angel I sound like an actual girl. But I'm not just any girl, I'm a FANGIRL! (I had to put that in there :)**

 **Enjoy!**

 **Simon POV**

So Clary hadn't _totally_ forgiven me. But I was so incredibly grateful for the extra chance she gave me. I didn't even deserve one after all the misery that I caused her. I would _never_ do that again in all my life. But it seemed like I wasn't the only one that got another chance. Something's up with her and Jace, he never offends her and he was actually acting… nice to her.

Same thing with Sebastian…

 _Flashback to last week_

 _"That test was torture! I mean is that even allowed in a high school math class?"  
"You know that I'm free anytime to help you out if you need it Clary."  
"Actually I already have a tutor, Mr. Starkweather is forcing me." Her grades must have dropped or something… Why did I have to pull that stunt? By the angel I was such an idiot._

 _"So who's the poor soul?"  
"Simon Lewis! You say that as if it's impossible to be stuck in a room with me." She was continuing my joke wasn't she? That wasn't her slipping in a slight truth to hint at me was it? How do I respond to that? Insulting her again would be a bad idea right?  
"Well you got me there Fairchild." Being demeaning to myself should be a safe move._

 _"Well you see the first step to solving your problem is realizing that you have one. It's good that you admitted it, and now we can continue your path to being a better person. Now I am available for counseling session if yo-"  
"Hey Clary how did you think you did on the math test?" Said Sebastian, striding up right next to Clary, practically shoving me out of the way. What is Sebastian doing talking to Clary like he's her friend? He pulled the same "nice" facade earlier and I don't get it. It was just like what Jace was doing. The only difference was Clary reacted to Jace much differently than she did to Sebastian._

 _"Sebastian you aren't even in my class. How did you know that I just took a test?"  
"I have Starkweather the period before you." He calmly replied, making this "conversation" between him and Clary even more disturbing…_

 _"Yeah well the test was pretty difficult, but I think I did alright."_

 _"I think I did the same, but number 26 was pretty difficult. I got x=4.54, what did you get?" Is he seriously trying to have a normal conversation with Clary? Well at least she looked uncomfortable and it wasn't another Jace case.  
"Umm, I don't actually remember what I got for 26, but I have to go to lunch." _

_"Okay, I'll see you around then?"  
"Sure Sebastian." _

_Modern times_

That day was so weird. Ever since then, Sebastian hasn't been overly nice, but he hasn't been hanging out with Aline's group, or tormenting Clary for a while. It seems almost to good to be true.

Apparently I was so caught up in my thoughts, I never noticed the giant mass that shoved me to the floor.

 **Aline POV**

"Seb how's it going with Clary? Any magical sparks blooming?" I questioned in my favorite high pitched voice, the look on Seb's face was priceless. Pure disgust, mixed with a hint of annoyance at his… unsucess? (That's not a real word, but I couldn't find one that fit so oh well!)  
"What do you think?"  
"You want to fake failure, then have a 'stunning rebound'?"

"Look you are the one that is forcing me to make a move on her. Why do I have to do this again?" _Ugh you ask so many questions_

Of course I couldn't tell him the real reason, so I had to find some way to motivate him. "Because if you become Clary's boyfriend I will get you the number of any girl you want on the cheerleading team." His eyes light up in lust, besides, no one had to know I gave away their number right?

"You sure about that?"  
"Positive. But take too long or don't do it and the offers gone."  
"Oh I'll be her boyfriend, you can make sure of that." _Teenage boys were so easy to manipulate and use._

"I'll hold you to that." With that I left him, hopping into my car.

"ALINE IS THAT YOU!" _Dammit dad's drunk again._

"Yes I'm home and I'll get started on the dinner now." I hastily replied, standing stiff.  
"Well what are you doing just standing around here then?"  
"Nothing, nothing." My hands were shaking as I rushed over to the kitchen. It is not fun using a knife while fearing for your life. (That rhymed!)

"So how was school you brat? What happened on that English essay?"  
"I got an A+ on it."

"Did anyone else get an A+" _He'll find out if I lie anyways, might as well just tell him the truth now._

"Just Clary."  
"Did you get a higher grade?"  
"I don't know, only that we were the only two to score so well. Besides I totally pass her in math so I probably passed her in this." _Please just let me finish dinner_

"So are you okay with being compared to this girl, as an EQUAL! I raised you to be the best and to be the only one! That's what your mother would have wanted if you hadn't been dumb enough to kill her!" _What happened to the old dad, before mom died? He used to support me in everything, but since she go this by that car he started drinking. Why can't I just have my dad back?  
_ "I promise that I'll try harder!"  
"That's never enough you useless (insert choice word)!" He shouted, landing the first slap on my cheek. Crashing down to the ground I could only see my father's leering smile before pain came, then everything went black.

 **I really like Aline, so I just had to have that justification. Okay that wasn't justification, but I'm planning it next chapter. "No one is without tragedy." Said by me.**


	25. Aline's Backstory

**So this chapter is really short, but I didn't really know what to write but I just decided to do this chapter about Aline's backstory. It's mainly a filter until I know what to write next. Oh and I didn't even read this over because I think my lifestyle of getting less than 7 hours of sleep a night is catching up on me. *Yawns***

 **also, I don't really know what to do next for this story, so if anyone wants to review or pm me with ideas, that would be a huge help and I could update sooner. I credit and it would mean so** **much to me.**

 **Aline POV**

Angels. Ugh it felt like there were a million tiny needles pricking me all over my body as I woke up. The only thing that would make this worse is if it was my first time this happened. The day I learned my father was a monster was the day I stopped loving anyone. I can't even remember what happened then, just a blur of pain and blackness.

Groaning, I managed to stumble onto my feet. _There go my dreams of being a dancer. Or even remotely balanced._ Time for the worst part, evaluation.

There were 4 dark red lines streaked across my right cheek, standing out like a red flag screaming _abuse! Abuse!_ On my left side, by my ribs, there was a dark purple splotch that was covering the majority of my ribs. _I need to buy some more painkillers._ Not to mention the bright red-pink color staining my left arm from my elbow to right before my wrist. _I really wish he hadn't dumped the pot of water on my arms last night…_

He was the reason that I had to become so good at makeup. Once I finally got old enough to use makeup, it became my best friend. If I just started randomly wearing foundation and concealer and all that other stuff without any obvious makeup, there could be some suspicions.

 _When I was 11_

" _Aline are you wearing makeup? " Of course Rachel of all people would notice this. I mean she's the fashionista of 6th grade. I was just at the mall for crying out loud!_

" _Yeah I'm just trying something out."_

" _Look Aline I would commend you on trying to cover up that ugly face of yours, but you should seriously take a class or two.'"_

" _Rachel I said that I am just trying it out, and it's probably not going to become an everyday thing."_

" _Aline, when I said a class, I meant hire someone, or wear a mask."_

" _Rachel why do you have to be so cruel about this?" Rachel's face twisted into a smug grin, one I would be wearing in the future.._

" _Aline why are you being so mean about this! I was just offering my opinion on your makeup," And now she was shouting, making a fool out of me,_

 _Needless to say, Rachel was one of the reasons that I had to ensure that I was queen bee of the school._

 _End Flashback_

Not to mention I had to push everyone away from me, making sure that I was this arrogant, stuck up, queen bee who had a face always caked in makeup. I missed actually having friends, I can't remember the last time I ever confided in someone. Since Patrick started abusing me, I've been anything but the self-confident girl everyone thinks I am.

So many people hate me, want me to just leave the face of the Earth. And I tried that. Waking up in the hospital after an overdose was not every pleasant.

 _2 years ago_

 _There was a steady beeping noise, filling me in on where I was. A hospital. Patrick's going to be so pleased about this._

" _Are you up yet you brat? Why did you have to go and take too many pills? They had to examine you and found a ton of bruises on you, It's soo unfortunate that you were clumsy enough to fall down the stairs, and forgot to tell me."  
_ " _You know that's not what happened."  
_ " _Yes it is. That is exactly what happened and nothing else."  
I was very happy when the nurses came in and I could lose myself in a world of darkness._

 _Current time_

Why couldn't I just be a normal teenage girl that worried about makeup and outfits to wear to school, and I stress about makeup and outfits that cover all my bruises. (A/N: Yeah so that sounds like a stereotypical girl but oh well)

I hated myself for that girl that I had become. I felt regret every time I hurt someone like Clary, but I had no other choice. I had to make myself this girl who hurt everyone in her way, and who was despised. If someone got close to me, they would expect me to tell them things and get close to them, they could figure out my secret. I can't let anyone know about what he does.

Instead I'm just a broken girl, hiding behind a mask.

 **Any ideas for what I should do next?**


	26. Breaking Out (And Not In Pores)

**Okay I'm trying to update more frequently, and I just got this inspiration while my science teacher was going over what was going to be on Friday's test. But I just had to write it down, I'll study later.**

 **So I know that I keep on bothering you people about it, and I'm trying to to sound like a nag here. But I'm going through some writer's block. I'm trying to write through it, but this chapter is only 750ish words instead of the normal 1000ish words. I really need help with ideas for what happens next in this story. Help!**

 **Valentine** **POV**

"It's done, they just got assigned today, and all we need to do is follow the plan at dinner." Pangborn confirmed, giving me joy I never thought I'd feel in my life. Tonight I was finally getting out of this hellhole called prison.

"Everything is planned out?" There would be _no_ flaws in my plan. It took years for our people to be certified to work at this prison, and I wasn't waiting another day.  
"Yes. I just got out of a meeting with Blackwell and if it starts at 6 pm, it ends our stay here."  
"We only have one shot at this. You know what happens if anything goes wrong."  
" _Everything_ is perfectly in place."  
"Good. Now prepare and get out of my sight."

 _Thought that you had me outsmarted when you called the police did you Jocelyn? I gave you absolutely all of my love. I could have followed my parents wishes and married that other girl, and followed the family tradition of doctors. Instead I still ended up with a pretty successful job, but got amor rejection from all family. I never cared about that. I only wanted you, and you never understood. I worshiped the very ground you walked on, and that girl ruined everything._

 _Jonathan was everything we could have ever wanted. I followed all the steps in the books to ensure he was the perfect child. And he was. I did the exact same thing for Clarissa, but I got a very different result. I never even wanted another child! I ensured that three wouldn't be another offspring, but yet that disappointment came into this world. You wouldn't get rid of it for the entire world._

 _She was never obedient to me, never listened or behaved. She was the imperfect daughter to my perfect son. She just had to be punished. The same went for my ex-wife when she sided with that mistake over me._

 _All she did was praise her when she should have been giving me the love and respect that I gave her. Both of them were the reason that I had lost that case, and I lost my reputation. I was instantly placed under my top competitor, Lucian-Luke-Garroway. We both had the same status, until I lost everything. You are so going to pay for that…_

-Time skip-

5:55, five more minutes until the first punch would be thrown. Time to head over to Pangborn.

"Pangborn, let me talk to you for a little bit." We exit to the back corner of the room, far enough so no one hears, but not far enough to raise suspicion for the onlooking guards.

We small talk for about three minutes, then start the plan.  
"So you think that you're too much better then me because you've got less age!" I yell at Pangborn, balling up my fists.  
"I never said that, if you actually had a brain then you would have realized that!" He took the same stance I did, raising a bit of an alarm.

"It's not my fault that you're so thickheaded!"  
"At least I'm not oversensitive like you!" Now we have three guards slowly making their way over here.

"That's it!" I shout, and throw the first punch to his jawbone, looking a lot more painful than it actually was. Instantaneously we broke out into a full on fight, bring those guard running.

I may have gotten a bit carried away as I had already gotten a punch to the jawbone, stomach, and an almost kick to his hip before I was intercepted

"Okay break it up!" I find myself shoved to the ground before I wish. It had been so long since I could hurt someone, and I can;t go long without it again. The rush of adrenaline, fear in other's eyes, cries of pain, who doesn't love that?

"That's it both of you are headed back to your cells!"

"Could you be any rougher?" I'm not overly fond of people tugging me, and no one pulls at my hair.

"Relax Valentine, we're getting paid so muchI wouldn't dream of harming a hair on your head. Besides, you're already there."  
"This is a trash chute."  
"Well we were limited to luxury, and besides the incinerator is turned off."  
"And you have the trash replaced and a new pair of clothes waiting for you at the bottom."  
"Fine." Before I knew it I was sliding down metal slide, to a whole new world where I could finish what I had started.

You were going to pay for all the harm you caused to my perfect family Clarissa, You better run for your life.

 _Echromai_

 **I don't know what to do when I break the news to Clary...**


	27. He's Back!

**So I'm trying to update A.T.R. at least once a week, but's really hard. School is crazy, but I go on spring break next week and I want to get at least one update in then. Plus it's getting... challenging coming up with ideas for this story.**

 **To the guest that reviewed in Spanish: first of all, thank the angel for google translate! Secondly, thanks for the review, it helped with the last chapter and what may come in future ones.**

 **Here is chapter 27: He's Back!**

 **Clary**

Do you know that feeling when you think that everything in the world in the world is finally falling back into place, but then life just has it out for you? That sums up my entire existence.

Just when everything finally seemed to be getting better, I was starting to warm back up to Simon, and Jace was really helping me with math and the exact opposite of what he was before, my mom was finally acting like my mom, and Jonathan, well that was the only thing that didn't improve.

Then my dad comes crashing in.

 _A couple hours ago_

 _"Now Clary, I will love you know matter what, but don't go around acting like Haley and doing what she does. No saying your having sex with someone as a way to get out of conversations with me!" Sure the episode was a rerun of when Sarah was helping Andy with his new job._

 _"Mom, since when have I even hinted at that?"  
"Good point. I know that I can trust you." From the look in her eyes, I can tell that she is 100% genuine. The mere thought of my mom fully trusting and putting her faith in me brings a mile wide smile to my face, and on hers too._

 _Ring! Ring!_

 _"Hello?…This is she…Wait WHAT!" Something just happened on the phone with my mom. "He did WHAT!… What's going to happen to my family now?" What was that person on the phone telling her? "There better be all the necessary precautions after he got away from where YOU were holding him!… Yes I understand… Goodbye." Okay, now I was worried._

 _"Mom, what's going on? Who was on the phone?"_

 _"That was the police, they just told me that your father… escaped."_

 _End Flashback_

Since then everything has been a blur. A massive red blur of emotions. Every wall that I had built up to protect myself from my own nightmares of my father. The man that ruined my life, plagued my every nightmare, the reason I have had to live my life in fear for so many years, if now free!

I had just finally gotten over my father. Simon used to be the only boy that I ever trusted. Since that lonely night after I told Simon everything. That was really the only way I had managed to survive with Jace for so long, I would have never survived with out his help.

For so long he beat me bloody, until I couldn't even move. I despised him with all the hate that my heart could contain.

I'd just been shutting myself away from all humanity. I couldn't bring myself to carry my body outside and face the rest of my family. I just can't. I just stopped the tears. Honestly, I don;t consider myself an easy crier. But when something like this happens, I can't even finish my thoughts as another waterfall of tears pour down my heated cheeks, and a chocked sob escapes my throat.

Maybe reading can help distract me. _Worth a shot_ I grab the first book I find, _The Diary of a Young Girl. That's that book about the Jewish girl… Anne Frank I think._ I open to the first page, and engross myself in the reading for a while until I reach a certain part.

 _"Saturday 28 November 1942_

 _Mr. Dussel complains about me all the time. And the said he liked children! He complains to Mother, and then she is angry with me too. I think about it all in bed at night. Am I so bad? I either laugh or cry, and then I fall asleep, wanting to be different. It's very confusing."_

Anne's life seems a bit like my own. I'm not hiding in a secret annex, but the connections she has to her family.

Mr. Dussel is anyone at school. I do one wrong thing, and then there's a thousand other-worse-things that everyone else mocks me for.

Her mom, is a mixture of Jonathan and my own mother. Jonathan just goes along with the crowd and what they say, he never retaliates against them or tries to defend me like a normal brother does. Sure he's acting with a bit more hospitality now, but he still hangs out with Aline and lets her poison his mind. For my mom, well in the book they never get along. Anne just can't find it in her to warm up to her mother because she is so frustrating.

The father, who is Anne's preferred and much more loved parent, is like no one for me. I used to have Simon in that role. Always there for me, understanding what I was going through. I might have forgiven him, but nothing can change what happened in the past.

Peter, who is like a confusing love interest, is like Jace. Sometimes you can act like best friends, but there are so many complications in-between, so many people standing in the way. But the biggest obstacle is ourselves. The way that we feel about each other. I don't even know how I feel about Jace right now.

Then there's the Nazi's, who are what they are hiding from. In my awful life, that's my dad. The storm on a rainy day, the pothole stopping you from reaching your destination, the burden on your shoulders you can _never_ get off. I've tried so hard to free myself from his grasp. I was finally getting over him, then he comes right back into my life like a wrecking ball. He is the reason that I can't live my life without pain. I will always have him weighing down on me. And now he's loose!

Maybe this book wasn't such a good idea. Even when I try to do reading, something that I have always enjoyed, everything relates back to him.

I will never be free of my father, and the burden that he is in my life.

 **Valentine**

"Blackwell how is my dear family reacting to my prison outbreak?"  
"I'm looking at the living room through their window **(A/N I don't think I specified where they live but it's a house)** and no one's in there. There was a call a couple hours ago that made Jocelyn and that daughter break out into tears though. Jonathan has been out of the house for a while. Wait, the police just showed up outside their house. They must be there to keep you out." _I hope you didn't miss me too much. And don't count on those police._

"Glad to see that their reacting to my return. I'm so glad they haven't forgotten me!" I replied, sarcasm dripping from my every word.

"You're not a very forgettable person Valentine. Now remember, as much as you want to make your move, you can't. Those police just proved my point. We don't have to wait forever, but only until they let their guard down. Then we strike like a python."  
"The deadliest one in the world." With that I end the call, with grin slowly forming on my face.

You are going to regret ever being born my dear Clarissa.

 _Echromai, I am coming._

 **All credit for the Anne Frank reading goes to Anne Frank, it is an excerpt. Also, at least this chapter is a bit longer than the others right?**


	28. One Hectic, Chaotic, Horrible Week Later

**So it looks like I came through with my promise of updating during spring break. I was actually really worried that I wouldn't have a plot, but it came to me after I finished a test early had free time. So I just haven't been sitting down to write, until I forced myself to today. Surprisingly, this chapter practically typed itself! and a miracle happened: I PROOFREAD THIS CHAPTER! (Although there are probably still some mistakes.)**

 _One week later_

 **Jon**

Valentine. He's the cause of my mom and sister consolidating themselves to their rooms, the cause of their misery, all because of that one sick creep. But I guess I can't say much.

Who was the one to endlessly hurt my sister, side with her worst enemy? Honestly, the reason that I did that in the first place was stupid. I guess stupid people make stupid mistakes. Of course the main reason of my sister hating me just texted me.

 _Aline: Hey y u not in skool?_

Now that I think about it, she's really pathetic. All that makeup that makes her look like a clown, and she is so desperate for attention.

 **Jon: Whole family is sick**

 _Aline: Can u make Clarebear sicker? I don't want to have to see her_

 _face at school_

That was a low blow, it's not like she's ever dealt with an abused dad has she!

 **Jon: Stop talking about my sister like that**

 _Aline: Oh pls its not like u ever cared about her_

Thats not true! I did care about my sister! Did care… When did I stop caring for my little sister? I just needed to find my own group of friends who understood me. Only they understood me in all the wrong ways. Aline was making my sister miserable and being a (insert choice word), and I had to get her away from my sister. I had to act like a _real_ big brother.

 **Jon: Okay that's it! If you really want know, I am siding over my sister. And I would choose her anyway over you. All you do is tease and torment her and I am done with your dictatorship.**

Too bad it took me so king to realize what Aline really was. I could have been there for Clary all of those years ago.

 _Aline: Did the sickness get u ur head? U are in my group and I am better than everyone, especially her_

 **Jon: Not anymore. Stop talking to my sister and leave our family the hell alone. Goodbye Aline.**

After my little rebellion, it was time to truly apologize for what I've done. Not some lame apology in a hospital. If only an abusive-now-escaped-father wasn't what made me realize that I was the worst person in the world. I should have realized it years ago. I had to right my terrible wrongs.

I was going to get my sister back, and treat her right.

 **Clary**

Despite the fact I was doing homework, I couldn't hear myself think. Music was blasting through my headphones, some random "hit song" that I didn't even know. But it helped me get busy, helped to distract me from reality. I was knee deep in algebraic equations that I didn't even like! By choice!

A short knock on my door disrupts me from my tedious busy work.

"Clary, can I talk to you?" _How about no after all that you've done just ends up hurting me._

"Go away Jon, I'm busy."

"Clary please open the door."  
"I locked it for a reason." _To keep people like you out!_

"Then I guess you'll just have to listen." A soft shuffle followed by a loud thump tells me that he's now on the ground, leaning against my closed door.

"I know that I tried to explain things in the hospital, but that wasn't good enough. The truth was, I was jealous of you." _He was what!?_ "You and Simon were such good friends from the start, even though he was your only friend, you two where as thick as thieves. I wanted someone who would be the Simon in my life. Then Aline came along. She fed me her preposterous lies about how Simon was forced to be your friend. I kept on telling her to go away at first, telling her that she was spreading lies. For a while, I protected you. But then I fell into her trap. I was a fool Clary." I can't remember a time when Jon actually cared about me or ever protected me. Not since I very little. Well, littler. "I was just in kindergarten, and after a while, she lured me in like a siren. Then when dad left, Aline was the one that I turned to, she told me the worst lies. I never told her about the abuse, but I did tell her that our parent were getting divorced. She said that it was all your fault. And I believed her. Every vile lie she burned into my brain. I regret it so much now. I was never there to comfort you when you needed me. She gave me everything I ever wanted: popularity, friends, a great time, everything that I now despise. For so long I've acted the opposite of your brother. I would do anything to take it back. I just want to be your big brother." Without realizing it, I was on the other side of the door, leaning against it like my brother was, desperate to hear the truth in his words. I missed having my brother act like a real brother.

"How do I know that you're not fooling me, or playing a prank on me?" _If that was true…_

"I promise I'm not. Angels, I hate that you think that I'm fooling you. I hate that you can never trust me, or rely on me." A hollow… laughing? sound comes from the other side of the door. _Is he… crying?_ My brother _never_ cried. "I got rid of Aline. I assure you. She's out of my life. I care about you more then popularity could ever offer me. If you open the door, I can show you the text. Please Clary, let me in. Let me try to make up for every wrong thing that I've done. I'm so over all my mistakes. I want to be your brother, and act like a _real_ brother would.

 _Do I let him in? The brother who has been ruining my life for the past years, hurting me when I'm weak, spilling all my private secrets, everything that made my life miserable._

There was one question that I needed answered.

"Can I trust you?"  
"You could trust me with your life." There wasn't a moment of hesitation in his response, his words were genuine.

Opening the door, I saw a sight I never would have thought possible.

A red faced Jon, his bright green eyes darkened with sorrow and regret, tears silently running down his cheeks, leaving trails in their wake. Then the text showing Jon breaking free of Aline's viper-like grip.

"I trust you Jon." And I meant it.

Not waiting a second, my brother flung his muscular arms around my lanky form, embracing me in a tight hug.

The Fairchild siblings were finally reunited, and they _weren't_ going to break apart ever again.

 **So what did you think? When do you think I should have Clary go back to school?**

 **Review responses: (only ones for chp. 27)**

 **winter's cry: Mags, I'm working on it.**

 **Guest: The reason that Valentine is obsessed with abusing Clary is because he never wanted a daughter, and he believes that she is the cause of all the mistakes in his life.**

 **Guest (Lily): Because of your review, I now have an idea of what to put in the chapter that Clary goes back to school.**

 **Guest: Your review has the same exact idea as "Lily's", thanks both of you for a great idea.**

 **Guest: Yes, I am going to finish this. It might take a while, but I don't want to put this on hiatus.**


	29. Not Everything Is As It Seems

**So I meant to update last week, but my computer broke for a week, since there was a malfuntion because of hackers and I couldn't use it. But anyways, here's my best shot at this chapter.**

 **Quick thanks to trifangirls for pointing out that I kept changing Jace's name, it should be Wayland to everyone else. If anyone notices I forgot to change it in a chapter, it would mean a lot if you told me so I can change it. I do make a lot of mistakes...**

 **Big shoutout for my chapter beta: winter's cry, she definitely helped me with this chapter because it's so important. Everyone should so and read her stories, they always have great detail, and amazing grammar.**

 **Here's the chapter! (I was going to put chappy, but that sounded so happy and unlike me.)**

 _One Week Later_

 **Clary**

"Come on Clary! We're going to be late to school!" Jon yells obnoxiously.

"I think that I'll go tomorrow!"

"Too late!" With that Jon grabs my backpack, picks me up, and carries me all the way to the car. And little me can't get down.

Don't get me wrong though, I love having my brother back. He's so caring, and it feels like a dream. I'm waiting to wake up and be insulted.

"Clary, just know that at school, it's not going to be the way it was. I'm going to be there for you, but Aline isn't going to back down."

"Jon, I'm not an idiot. I know that Aline will still run the school, just with one less person staring behind her."

"And you'll have one more person to stand behind you." He says, trying to boost my limited confidence.

"Now be quiet and focus on the road, you're going to get us killed."

 _*one eternity later*_

I hate new quarters. Since first quarter ended last week, I get a new schedule. At least that's what got me an extra week away from school. But now, I have PE.

I. HATE. PE.

There are two reasons why: 1) I am an unathletic nerd that is always the slowest. 2) I still have scars from my father, so I always have to be the last to shower. It gets really annoying when I'm always late to my next class. I would love to just apply deodorant and leave, but the whole unathletic part means that I sweat. A lot.

I guess I'll have to love it, since I have 5 minutes until PE. Yay for first period torture…

 _*short ten minutes time skip*_

"For this quarter's PE, I will need everyone at 110%! I need everyone pushing themselves to their physical limit! I do not accept slackers in my class!"

Mr. Aldertree was my least favorite kind of PE teacher. He was louder than my brother, which fit _just_ perfectly with his short, balding physique. His head was so shiny; it was reflecting the gym lights. He would never give me a break in this class. Yay me…

"Now run out to the track and give me half a mile!"

*yeah, I know. It's another time skip*

I can see the other girls all rushing to the showers, running to shower, removing all sweat smells, some reapplying their makeup, in under ten minutes. At least the hustle makes sure no one pays attention to me.

By the time I get to the locker room, all the hormonal, teenage girls are out of the showers. My heart is pounding as I make my way over to the showers in my smelly PE uniform. There is no one else in the showers, so I strip and put my hair into a bun. I am not going to walk around the rest of the day with wet hair. As soon as I'm about to turn on the shower, I sense movement behind me. I turn around, and it's…

"Aline!" Both of us scramble for our discarded towels to cover our injured bodies. Wait, _bodies_?

"Clary!" She exclaims, but then her eyes wander to my scared stomach. My eyes investigate all over her body, where there numerous bruises all over her body.

"You're abused too?" I ask, the one thing I never thought Aline could ever be. She could definitely tell I was abused, because the vile scar on my stomach was too mangled to be medical. The short nod of her head confirms everything.

"Since I was four."

"Since I was almost five." I confessed.

"Every time I wasn't the best, I got a bruise to try and motivate me." _How is it that Aline has been abused longer than me? I mean she's so strong and confident, even if she didn't act the nicest._

"I never thought that this happened to you." _Aline, the queen of the school. The girl who always had all the power, was just like I was. Defenseless to abuse._ I honestly don't know how to feel.

So many feelings are running through my mind, ranging from disbelief to strong empathy for Aline.

"Let me explain myself. Once my mom died, my dad never took it well. He made himself obsessed with my perfection. Every project, assignment, grade, everything had to be the best. That was why I was so cruel to you."

Aline's face is just like Jon's was last week, full of sorrow and the hurt from her life. A tear slipped out of her almond eyes, but her makeup was still in place. I guess she applied it well.

"That was the reason I was so cruel to you. I couldn't be 2nd place, so I thought I could make you drop out. I had to be at the top, be the person everyone hated so no one ever had to know too much about me. I hate acting like this, like a spoiled, stuck-up brat." I'm so tempted to think that this is all fake, that I can't let my guard down. I'm took a risk a minute ago by letting Aline know that my bruises are real. But for once in my life, I trust Aline. And she trusts me.

"Aline, I understand what you did, it was a defense. If you didn't, you might have died." Could I have turned out like Aline if Valentine was still hurting me. What if he came back? _No Clary, don't let yourself think about him. You need to focus on Aline right now. She's telling the truth._

"I don't even know why I'm telling you this right now. I'm supposed to hate you, and want you out. " Her hands flew to her face as her entire body was overwhelmed by the tears pouring out of her eyes. "I hate what I've turned into, and I am so sorry for everything I've done." Her voice was almost unrecognizable from the tears, and her voice sounded so miserable.

Nothing like the Aline I knew.

I move over to comfort her, normally it would be awkward to comfort a girl only wearing a towel, but at the moment I could care less.

"Aline, my abuse stopped so many years ago. For you to still be going through it, how do you survive?"

"I still think my old dad is in there somewhere, and he'll die if I leave him."

"So all these years…"

"Yeah."

"Now it all makes sense, You've been suffering for so long." Aline, abused for years.

"I know that this won't make up for it, but I am sorry from the bottom of my heart for what I've done to you these years."

There was no way this could be a joke, no makeup can make those bruises. And Aline was so genuine in her words. Everything made sense, and I couldn't be mad at her for what wasn't her fault.

"Aline, what happened to you wasn't your fault in the slightest." I say, while trying my best to comfort her. "There's really nothing to forgive."

"I've been such an awful person."

"Hey, it's okay, it wasn't your fault." I'll admit, it was quite weird comforting the girl who was my mortal enemy five minutes ago. Then a sad thought struck me like a lightning bolt. "Aline have you ever had a _real_ friend? Someone you can rely on and trust? Or even someone who you can laugh with?"

"No." She replies while quivering.

"That changes right now. Aline, from now on you can count on me." Her helpless look was now filled with hope. Aline flung her body at mine in a bone-crushing hug, making silent tears stream down my face.

"Thank you. Thank you so much Clary."

The ringing of the bell told us that we were late, but neither of us cared.

Because we had each other.

 **So? This chapter took me a couple hours, I really tried hard to get the emotions.**


	30. Misunderstandings And Trust Issues

**What? An update less than a week later? I actually had this chapter in my head, and it would have been up earlier, but school stinks. I have three tests, and a quiz next week that are all going to be super hard. So I might take longer than a week to update, since my school's fair is Friday and Saturday. But, here's chapter 30!**

 **(Jace is back! Thanks to OurLittleInfinity3 for reminding me to put our favorite golden boy back in)**

 **Jace**

If someone had told me a couple months ago that I would _willing_ be waiting to tutor Clary Fairchild, I would have laughed in their face. Followed by some red head joke. But then again, if someone told me that I would need that girl to help me see the world, I would have laughed in their face.

I didn't know how just much I needed Clary.

It's not just because she showed me how the world really is. Although, I can't believe that I was so dumb. My life was so perfect after I became a Wayland, I never thought about how life would be for other people. But that's not the only reason I need her.

Clary is, how do you describe her? She's someone who keeps on going. Even after her father, Simon leaving her, having the world turned against her, Clary still seemed to handle it. She's like a bright flame that can never extinguish.

I never saw how amazing she was, until she opened her eyes. When I saw the world for its true light, I saw Clary. Not the Clary that Aline hated, that there were so many false rumors about, just Clary. A redheaded sophomore who loved sarcasm.

Ever heard that saying, 'you never know how important something is until you almost loose it'? I thought I knew it. But when I saw Clary with that phone, something stirred inside me. It was a heap of anger, sorrow, sadness, but most of all, regret.

Regret that I never really understood what I was doing to other people. Especially Clary. I just let my (terrible) ex-girlfriend stomp all over her. Clary Fairchild was just another nerd, another person I hurt. But now, she's not. Now, she's someone I want to know more. I want to earn her forgiveness. Someone I want to be friends with.

 _What is this girl doing to me?_

"Okay Aline, I gotta go now. I have to go get some math help." That voice belonged to Clary, but she said the word Aline. And she wasn't making a comeback. What?

"K, see you tomorrow!" That was definitely a higher pitched, more annoying,\ voice that only belonged to Aline. The click clack of her high heels down the hall made me sure I wasn't hearing things.

But Clary _and_ Aline? _How? What? Why? When did this happen?_

 _Maybe she threatened Clary to be nice to her around me so I would go back to being her boyfriend. She probably faked anything. What if Clary is being blackmailed?_

"So what are we doing today?" Clary calmly asked, like she actually wanted to be talking to Aline. Like there was nothing unusual about it.

"Okay, cut the crap Clary. What did Aline do to you so you are now talking to her."

"She didn't do anything. I willingly want to be her friend."  
"How severe was the blackmail?"  
"By the Angel, Jace! She didn't _do_ anything! Me and Aline have been misunderstanding each other, and we resolved that conflict. Now she's my friend." _How is this possible? It can't be real. Aline has been tormenting Aline since they were kids, nothing could make them all buddy-buddy in less than a day!_

"I know Aline. This is all a trap to make you trust her, tell her all your secrets. Clary, you cannot trust Aline. You have to believe me Clary."  
"Jace, I get where you're coming from, but I sure you, Aline is not faking it."

"Clary, you cannot fall for Aline's fake story." Now she just seemed annoyed. But I had to make me point clear.

"Jace, this is _my_ life. I'm not an idiot. Aline is _my_ _friend_. No strings attached. Why are _you_ so involved in my life?" Clary said, putting stress on certain words to make me understand her perspective. Okay, now she really annoyed. But I had to make Clary see the light. Aline is not to be trusted!

"Clary, this is the most irresponsible and irrational choice that you've ever made. Aline is conniving and manipulative. She is just like your father!"

Clary's mood instantly went from annoyed, to pure anger. Her stance is now cold and unforgiving. I think I went a little too far…

"How. Dare. You. Say. That." She furiously spit out each word, while harshly poking my shoulder with each word. "You have no idea what I went through from my father! My brother was stupid enough to tell you about him. You cannot say anything about that man _ever again_." With that she turned on her heel, and stormed out of the room, a small tear running down her rosy cheeks.

I get that bringing her father up may have been a bit too harsh, but why is she so mad at me? I'm trying to protect Clary. I freak'n dated Aline. I know that Aline can never change. Nothing good can come out of this. There's some hidden catch to whatever Aline did.

 _What did she do? It must have been something clever, because Clary wouldn't fall for just anything. It would have to be well thought out, so probably involving another person. All Aline does is makeup, and tormenting Clary._

"Jace?" Great. The she-devil herself.

"Aline whatever you did to Clary is _not_ going to work on me."

"I didn't pull any tricks Jace. I'm 100% not like the Aline you knew yesterday." _Wait, what? How can someone change so fast? But it looks like she's actually serious… No! It's Aline. She can't be telling the truth._

"Why should I trust you? You've done nothing but ruined other people's lives, and you tricked me into being your accomplice."

"I understand why you wouldn't trust me, I can't even believe that I'm like this now. I can't tell you why, but I am _not_ doing this to hurt Clary or anyone else anymore."

Aline actually sounds like she's telling the truth. Her eyes are pleading, almost desperate for her to believe me. _Can I trust Aline?_

"I can't just forget everything."  
"I understand your point, it's really different. But you _have_ to believe Clary. We both realized our misunderstandings. You _need_ to go after her. I see the looks you give her when you think no one is watching. If you don't go after Clary now, it will be really hard to make her believe you. Just, trust Clary. Do it for her."

I may not trust Aline, but I do trust Clary. I have to go and get her back! I can't let her hate me again

"You're right. I have to go." With that I ran out the door the same way Clary did a minutes ago, running as fast as I could.

My heart was pounding in my chest, two words being repeated in my mind. _Find Clary. Find Clary. Find Clary._

I had to find Clary, had to make things right. _Angels! I'm such an idiot! Why would you compare her abusive father to a high school girl. I should have just trusted Clary, I'm on thin ice as is. This time Clary might not forgive me. You fool!_

Turning into the next hallway, a mane of bright redhead was just ahead, and I could never have been more relieved.

But that all went away what I saw who she was talking to, who was practically pinning her against the wall, about to move in on her lips.

 _Sebastian._

 **So? Also I'm going to start replying again to reviews, but they'll be on the bottom for those who don't like a long AN.**

 **Shauna Kullden: Thanks, I hope that you like this chapter! And thank you so much for reviewing so many chapters, I always love your reviews!**

 **Howling2themoon: Thank you so much, a simple awesome means so much to me. I love how you always review, it always puts a smile on my face.**

 **thatonefangirl1128: I think that in any fanfiction, everyone drowns in feelings. But I totally agree.**

 **.0: I totally understand your homework struggle. I'm glad that you had the time to sit through my poor grammar story though!**

 **Baby Biscuit: First of all, I love your name, even if you're a guest. I'm so glad that you thought it was sweet! The feels in that chapter...**

 **Guest: Thank you for the compliment, and I will definitely try my best.**

 **Sorry if those sounded too generic, but I meant every word.**


	31. Please Forgive Me?

**Yes, this is an update, not a prank. But be thankful for this update, I faked a study hall pass to get to computers to type half of this, and I have a really important science test tomorrow that I should be studying for. But I had to write.**

 **Clary**

 _Why did he have to say that? I knew that he would react weird when he found out that I was now friends with Aline, but to compare her to my father?_

 _Why was Jon so stupid? Why did he even tell Jace in the first place? Jace knows nothing about what I went through. Sure he knows what I told Simon, but he has no idea of the torture it was. Being called worthless every day, never having anyone that I could go to, always looking over my shoulder. I just wanted a safe place, was that too much to ask? Simon was the closest thing I had to something safe, but he ruined that. Even though I've forgiven him, there's no way that can ever forget what he did._

 _But Jace. I was finally starting to move past what he's done. I was just about to fully forgive him. If that tutoring session went well, I was going to tell him. I thought that I might have been able to trust him. I thought that he trusted me._

 _I guess not._

I was so enveloped in my thoughts, I didn't notice the person about to crash into me. They crushed my small figure, reminding me of when Jace tackled me. A jolt of pain spread through my body, concentrated at my head. But the worst part, the person who I ran into.

 _Sebastian_

"I guess that now you've finally realized how much you love me, dear Clary. And now you're throwing yourself at me." Sebastian purs, a sly smile on his pale face. _Please don't tell me that he's trying to seduce me._

"Sebastian, whatever you are trying, stop." With that tried to walk away. _Tried._

"Now Clary," He said, then he had me pinned against the wall, his arms a cage. "Hiding your feelings from me isn't the best choice."  
"There's nothing to hide _dear Sebby_." I spit at him, using the name he hates, and reveling in the grimace that he makes. "I hate you, now leave me alone."

"But I don't want to do that." He starts leaning in. _He can't try and kiss me!_ The only problem? I'm trapped by the monster.

Just as Sebastian is about to steal my first-yeah I know-kiss, he is ripped away from me.

"Get off of her!" _Jace? What is he doing here? Well at least he saved me…._

"You know she wanted it."  
"You sick creep!" Jace shoves him to the ground, and swings a fist at Sebastian's nose. There is a cracking sounds, followed by a stream of blood. Is his nose broken?  
Apparently that angered Sebastian-who knew? (Sarcasm) Because in the blink of an eye, Jace is overpowered and slammed on the tile floor.

I'm too shocked to do anything but stand there and watch them destroy each other. The next couple of minutes are a flurry of fists and moans of pain. But then Jace takes a nasty blow to the chin, and it snaps me out of my helpless state.

"The two of you, stop it!" Shouting, my feeble attempts to pull them off of each other is useless. There is a new bruise on them every couple of seconds. _Why is Jace doing this? Why would he go through so much pain, because of what Sebastian almost did to me?_

Here's a tip: Don't get lost in your head, next to a fight. You will get hurt. That was proven when another burst of pain hit my head, and I was knocked to the floor by surprise.

"Ow." That hurt more than when Jon would "accidentally" knock me to the ground. At least my pain made the teenager stop fighting.

"Shoot Clary, I didn't mean to hit you." _He can't be serious can he?_

"Just leave her alone! Haven't you caused enough damage already!" Jace practically growls at Sebastian, and it feels nice to have someone defend me.

"But I only meant to hurt you, not her!" _You have got to be kidding me._

"Just do everyone a favor and leave _Sebby_." It felt weird being so harsh, when I was lying on the ground, but I could not stand the sight of him! At least the nickname got through his thick skull, because Sebastian stomped off. Angrily, if I might had.

"You okay Clary?" Jace asks, while helping me stand up.

"I'm fine, you have it worst than I do." I wasn't kidding, There was a bruise forming at his jawline, and angry red marks on what parts of skin his clothes didn't cover. There were probably a lot more.

"While that may be true, you have a lump on your head that I'm concerned about."

"So you can be concerned about me, but you can't trust me?" I bitterly spat out, feeling a tad bit guilty as Jace's face morphs into a regretful one.

"That's why I was running to find you Clary. I do trust you." Jace pleads with me. _Wait, pleads? Since when has Jace ever pleaded, to someone else? But I still can't forgive him that soon. I don't have any proof._

"If you trust me, then why didn't you believe me? I told you that Aline is my friend, and you think that I'm going to get hurt. Do you think I'm a fool? I wouldn't fall for any trick from Aline, and she wasn't lying." I'm so mad, that I move away from Jace's physical support, which might not have been the best option. I end up stumbling into one of the shiny red lockers, making the throbbing in my head increase.

"Please Clary, I was just caught up in the moment, I promise that I completely trust and believe you. I know that I was already fighting for your trust, and I know that I don't deserve it. I just need you to believe me, that I believe you. I know that last sentence sounded weird, but please give me another chance. I don't deserve it since this is technically my third chance, but please Clary. Please." _He… I…. Just said… What?_

"Jace I-"  
"I know that if you don't forgive me, I have to back off, but please Clary." _His words are… real._ There was so much desperation in his voice, Jace wasn't going to do this again. His tone was so powerful in the fact that he will now trust me, and I just might be able to trust him. He also fought Sebastian because he was unwanted to say the least, and defended me in front of him.

"Jace, I forgive you." His face lit up like a christmas tree. But Jace got a little too excited and gave me a bone-crushing hug. Which isn't a good thing to do if someone is already in pain. "Jace, I have bones."

"Shoot, sorry about that Clary." He apologizes with a sheepish grin.

"It's fine, but every now and then I need some air."  
"So, math?"

 **Review replies:**

 **Shauna Kullden-I already PM'ed you, but thanks again for the great review! (no sarcasm intended)\**

 **Howling2themoon-Awesome is amazing. It's just... awesome. Like your awesome reviews!**

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 **Drakonna101-SO you might not really like this chapter, but I'm so glad you thought it was heartfelt.**

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 **Guest-I tried my best to fix up chapter one, I'm slowly getting around to editing the other chapters.**

 **Sorry if that sounded overly generic, but it's true.**


	32. Can You Move On?

**Yeah, another update. I can't believe I got an idea this fast, but I thought that it was time to bring Simon back into this. A big thanks to everyone who followed, favorited, or reviewed my story, it gives me the inspiration to keep on writing! Even if I may not be so good…**

 **Simon**

Existing the band room, I thought that I would just be able to go home. What I didn't know, was that I would watch a full-on fight, that was centered around around Clary. I saw her crash into Sebastian, and I saw him trying to talk to her.

I was about to attempt to pull him off her, but then Jace came in. Like a wrecking ball if I might add. He started a full on battle with Sebastian. And even though I hate to admit it, I'm a little thankful that he was there. I mean, what is a band geek supposed to do against a jock? Nothing really…

But it's _my_ fault Clary is in this situation anyways. I mean she told me her schedule, Clary should have been in tutoring at that time. The tutoring that _I_ used to tutor. I was her everything, and then I threw it all away. Clary's grades were always poor in math, but I was there to help her through it. I would help her get through everything.

But I can't anymore. I regret everything that I did against her. I was such an idiot! And it took me so long-too long-to realize what I did. I abandoned her, just because she didn't feel the same. Now all that Clary is around me, is tense. I can tell from her posture that she isn't fully comfortable around me. But you know who she conferable around?

Jace.

I know that Clary is starting to forgive him-she explained the whole process where he's trying to earn her forgiveness. But she never tensed like she used to when his name was brought up. That could just be from how tense she already is around me.

Well I thought she was comfortable around him.

That argument in the hall proved different. Well whatever that was. I could only hear some of it, but I don't think I needed words during that brawl. All I know is Sebastian tried to pull something on Clary, and Jace fought Sebastian because of that. But she seemed to be furious with both of them. Then Jace pleaded forgiveness, and it seemed that Clary forgave him. And she seemed enraged!

 _How had Jace managed to calm Clary down enough for her to forgive him?_

If I had to describe Clary in one word, it would be stubborn. Clary never thinks straight when she's mad, and she always sets her mind on something, and never stops thinking/doing it. Something is happing between them. I'm certain of it.

 _Wait… Does Clary… like Jace?_

"Ow. What happened?" I had to resit the urge to laugh at a clueless looking Sebastian. To see a popular-practically king-on the ground, clutching themselves in pain, _priceless._

 _Think Simon. Do you tell him, or watch what happens?_

"Hey you! What happened to me?" Well that rules out that option.

"You got beat to the ground by Jace." I haughtily replied, enjoying the fact that Sebastian was in so much pain that nothing could happen to me. The populars already hate me for leaving them.

"Jace Wayland?"

"No, the other Jace in our school. Yes Jace Wayland."  
"Don't play jokes with me," he suddenly took on a serious tone "I can ruin you."  
"You are already trying your hardest to do that, I don't think that you can do any worse." I said, finding confidence in myself. Why was I always pushed around?

"Oh really? So it would be just fine if I told the _entire_ school who much you _love_ Clary."

"I-I'm not in love with Clary." Why was my voice sputtering?

"Obviously." Sebastian said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "Look. Just give up on her. She doesn't love you back, and she will never love you like you love her. It's really sad seeing you chasing her around, trying to win her back." _How does he know so much?_

"Why should I listen to you? For all I know, you could be in love with Clary, trying to steer me off course."

"Do you think that I would even like that flat-chested midget? Even you think that idea is stupid, so why don't you listen to me. Clary loving you is out of the picture. Move on already! Get over her! She's just a girl, there's billions more."

"It's not my fault that you're a cold and heartless creature. I can't think of a single reason why Jace shouldn't have beat you to the ground." I bitterly spat out, the truth being too much to handle.

"Whatever. Just don't cry when she keeps on rejecting you." With that, Sebastian slowly stood up, and hobbled away. Leaving me to ponder his words.

 _Do I move on from loving my best friend? It's not just that, but can I open my heart to love again? Can I open my heart up to the possibility of another heartbreak? Can I love her, but only as a friend?_

It seemed like I have two options.

Option One: I continue loving Clary, even though I know she will never feel the same. But I don't let my heard risk further breaking.

Option Two: I find it in me to move on from Clary, and allow myself to love again. I may never find someone like Clary, but I can stop myself from the pain of her never loving me.

It seemed my choice was clear.

It wouldn't be easy, but I had to do it for myself.

I had to love Clary, but only as a friend.

 **So? What did you think? I'm trying to get more emotion and feelings from the characters. Sorry if you think it's moving too slow though…**

 **Review Responses:**

 **Fanfiction and Chocolate-First of all, if your name had Netflix in it, it would literally be my life. And thank you!**

 **Howling2themoon-Is it bad if I always love your responses, even if I sound selfish. Also, I read your TMI fanfiction, I love the detail!**

 **Fangirl89723-I want Clace to start soon, the next chapter will be leading up to it, I might put a Clace kiss. Maybe...**

 **marmaids-Thank you, your review put a smile on my face!**

 **Drakonna101-It's called I have no life, and I rush through all my homework.**

 **Guest-Clary does slay. I wanted to make sure she wasn't this weak little girl. I'm glad I didn't.**

 **If these responses sound generic, or un-authentic, they aren't. (Not to sound really mean)**

 **I love reviews, and if you want something to happen, review or PM and I can try my best!**

 **(I sound like my fanfiction is actually popular)**

 **-Lifeisbooks**


	33. Feelings

**So, it's been a bit too long, but I think that this should be a satisfying chapter.**

 **Jace**

"Clary, I can't thank you enough for giving me another chance." I tell her, while we're walking to my car. Jon asked me to give her a ride today, and who was I to leave Clary at school?

"Jace, that's the fourth time you've said that today. I think your point is clear."  
"Well, I just wanted to make my point clear?" I ask sheepishly, scratching my neck with my left hand. _If only you knew how much you meant to me._

"Jace," she says, turning around to face me, "I already last week forgave you. Can we please move on and talk about something else?" She says, while gently gliding her arm across my shoulder. To anyone else it would have seemed like an innocent gesture for a friend, but it meant so much more to me.

 _Can you do this Jace? Can you just be Clary's friend? You know why it was so important that she forgave you. You know about how you really feel about Clary. Are you alright with just being her friend?_

The past week with Clary had been amazing. We joked around, and there's enough inside jokes between the two of us to write a book. Just seeing her at lunch always brightens up my day. Her glowing smile, that would be directed at me, always made the same smile appear on my face. _How can this one girl have such an affect on me?_

But it's not just lunch. Whenever we talk, I can be myself around her. That was something I never had the luxury of before. Or did I? Well, I can be a different, improved person around Clary. She changed me for the better. I owe her so much for that.

 _But that isn't the reason you like her so much. You like her for many other reasons. Just admit it, at least to yourself, you like Clary!_  
Sometimes the nagging in my head gets very annoying.

"Jace, you there?" I snap out of my thoughts, seeing Clary look at me with a confused look. "You got lost in your head. Again. What are you thinking about up there?"

 _Trust me, you don't want to know._

"Oh, nothing." I reply, and we continue our slow walking pace.

"Okay you've always been daydreaming during our conversations, what are you thinking about up there?"

"The usual, football, homework, schemes to annoy Jon, the list goes on and on."

"Hmmhmm." I can hear the eyebrow raise in her voice. Well, eyebrows, since Clary can't lift just one. Unlike me.

"Clary, could there be more sarcasm in your voice?"  
"Obviously. The doubts you have in my sarcasticness is sad."  
"Is that even a real word?"  
"Obviously."  
"Are you going to stop saying that word?" "Obviously" had been Clary's favorite word for the past week. It drove everyone crazy. I thought she was finally over it, but I guess not.

"Milady I believe we have arrived at your destination." I point out, gesturing to her-now open-passenger door.

"Why thank you. You are _such_ a gentleman." She responds while getting in, the sarcasm could not be more obvious. _Why am I saying that word! Ugh! Well, technically I'm thinking it, but it's still pretty annoying._

"Jace, you're in Jaceland again."  
"Well I quite like _Jaceland_. Everyone worships Jace, and the word obviously is forbidden."  
"Jaceland sounds _terrible_."  
"How dare you insult my future kingdom!" Feigning hurt, I place my hand over my heart. "Jaceland will a place someday! You cannot crush my dreams!"

"Okay Jace, we both know that something has been on your mind for quite a while. I mean there's a certain limit to how much someone thinks about themself. What's been on your mind?"

 _How do you tell someone that they've been on your mind for the past week? That you've been thinking about them, trying to sort out your feelings. Well, is it sorting if I'm pretty sure that I like her. Oh what am I? 12? I like Clary, and I should tell her. Be open with my feelings. But what if she doesn't like me back? What if I start more problems between us. I just got her to forgive me, and I can't have her hate me again._

"It't really nothing. You have no idea how stressful my classes have been getting ."

"I'm only a year behind you, it can't be _that_ bad."

"Trust me, it's bad."

"Jace, I thought that we could trust each other. Why won't you tell me?" _Please don't make me feel guilty about this Clary. Damm it Clary_

"Fine then, you want to know what's going on." I step on the brakes, it's a stoplight, and look at her straight in the eye. "This past week has probably been the best week of my life. I'm trying to decide my feelings for you, seeing if I like you as more than a friend. My thoughts are all messed up, and I don't know what to think. So that's what been on my mind. Now you know. Happy?" I spit out, forcing my eyes back on the road.

"Jace…"

"Clary it's a green light. Don't distract me."  
"But-"  
"Don't Clary. Don't"

—

15 minutes of a very awkward and silent car ride, I arrived at Clary's house.

"We're here."  
"Look Jace-"  
"I drove you home, can you please go Clary?"  
"Jace, don't interrupt me. Look, I've been going through the same feelings. I just know how to hide feelings. I don't know what this is either Jace. I mean it wasn't that long ago when we both hated each other. I'm not overly sure about what I feel about you either. This whole liking someone is new to me." _Wait, like?_

"Like, as in you like me? As in more than a friend."  
"I thought that you would have been a little more familiar with the term Jace. Jace Wayland, awkward while admitting his feelings. I never thought I'd see the day." A short laugh escapes her rosy lips, count on Clary to bring humor into a very tense conversation.

"We both know this is first time I actually like a girl."  
"So you admitted it! You do like me! I think you got your feelings straightened out."  
"I just… You know this is difficult."  
"What's so difficult? I like you, you just said you liked me, have we passed the middle school confessions?"

Even though tensions were running high, I couldn't ignore the soaring joy that I now have from Clary's confession.

 _Come on Jace! Man up and do something about this! You both like each other, now do something about it! You have nothing to lose now, and if you don't do something about it, you could lose her!_

"Clary, I know that this might sound a bit weird, but will you go on a date with me?"  
Her eyes widened, her breathing hitched. Did I come on too strong?

"No strings attached, if it fails, then you can just tell me." _Please tell me an answer, say something!"  
_ "Jace, I…" _She's thinking about it, weighing the pros and the cons? Do the pros outweigh the cons?_ This whole being nervous about a girl is so weird. _Why are my hands getting clammy and sweaty?_

"Clary, if it's no, then I can take it. Don't feel pressured to say yes."  
"Jace, you idiot. You aren't even giving me time to respond. Do you know how fast you're talking? I caught one word."  
"Ohh, umm. I asked you if you would-"  
"I heard that part dummy. And it's kinda cute seeing you stutter over your words. Who knew this could be possible?" _That still isn't an answer!_ "Jace, relax. The answer is yes."

"Wait, what?'

"I said yes, I will go on a date with you. Just don't make me regret it."  
"I promise, you won't."  
"Now how are we going to tell Jon about this?"

 _Shoot._

 **I will edit it tomorrow, I am so tired and I needed to update.**

 **Review Responses: (It may sound generic, but it's heartfelt)**

 **Shauna Kullden-Simon is a great character, but my fav is Magnus.**

 **Fanfiction and Chocolate-I love your name, and thank you for the sweet review!**

 **Fangirl89723-I'm planning on it happening, slowly but subtly**

 **lazyfangirl-I hope that was enough Clace, and I have to use that quote sometime**

 **adarkandlightangel-Well, he finally did!**

 **Howling2themoon-Sounds like a good story!**

 **Little Tiger-Well, Sebby isn't off the hook just yet... And thank you!**

 **Willowbean117-That means so much to me, thank you!**


	34. Telling The Brother

**So it's been a bit too long, but my life has been so busy. But school ends on the 27th, and I only have one final to take. Then there's summer school, but expect more updates when school is out, but only one or two until it's over.**

 **An 164 reviews!? You guys are so amazing! Thanks for reading my infrequent updates and sticking through it all.**

 **Jon**

I'm still processing what just happened on my date. It was a really good date. Janice had a witty, sarcastic personality, and didn't mind bruising my ego. She's kinda like Clary, but a 5'7, brunette with a narrow face and hazel eyes.

The part I'm still processing: she wore long jeans that weren't clinging to her legs like a second skin, and she didn't stick out her chest and use a seductive voice. It wasn't like Janice wasn't well built, but she wasn't anorexic skinny or overly busty like those girls I used to go out with.

Janice is… real.

Maybe that's why I didn't pay any attention to her until after I ditched Aline. Well, before Clary became sudden friends with her. At first, I wanted to slap Aline, then slap sense into Clary. However, about an hour later I saw that Aline was different. Now for the first week of her and Clary's friendship, everything has gone quite well. Aline was accepted by everyone in our group-really just me, Clary, Jace, and Simon, it's a very small group.

I'd like to bring Janice into our group though. I wouldn't expect her to eat lunch everyday with us, she has her own friends, but I think everyone will love her.

Unlocking the door, I am approached with an unusual site. Clary is asleep, but her tiny head rests on one of our blue velvet pillows, a pillow that is on Jace's lap. Her expression seam's relaxed and peaceful, she must have been asleep for a while. Jace is sitting up, one arm resting on the arm of our mint green couch-my mom really likes that color, and never lets me call it green. Always _mint_ green. **A/N: I couldn't find their favorite color, so I just used mint green-my favorite color. But if anyone knows, please tell me, I'm clueless.**

But here's the thing, his other arm rests in the dip between Clary's hip and chest. Also, there's the occasional glance at Clary, then back to _Avengers_. Jace is so involved in the movie, that he doesn't notice me observing-not stalking-him and my sister. But it's a Marvel movie, so who can blame him?

But I still can't believe how close Jace and Clary are right now. For while they've been good friends, almost as good of friends like how Simon and Clary were. It's a little strange, but I'm glad that she has a really good friend like Jace. I mean, she's still friends with Simon-she shouldn't have forgiven him so easy in my opinion-but I know that Jace won't pull _a Simon_. Plus, it seems like they both enjoy each others company. I really hope that Clary just feel asleep, and Jace didn't want her to get neck pain. _That's the reason…_

 _I wonder if I can take advantage of how distracted he is. If I have to see him and Clary look like a couple, I should have some fun with this. As long as they don't actually become a couple. That would be disastrous._

"How's the movie Jace?" His response is instantaneous. Jace jumps up like coach caught him sleeping during practice, his eyes franticly searching for something. Unfortunately, Jace's sudden movement causes Clary's head to fall to the floor. _Shoot._

"Clary!" We both shout at the same time, hoping she didn't hit her head on the mahogany table in front of the couch. Trust me, that hurts.

"What? Is the movie over or something?" Her tired voice asks, at least there isn't any pain in her voice.

"Are you alright?" ask, while Jace apologizes for dropping her. We both grab one arm to pull Clary off the ground.

"You do know that I'm not fragile right? All I did was fall off the couch, not a cliff!"

"But couches hurt. Remember that one time Jon, when you rolled off the couch in your sleep and complained for the next hour about your head hurting?"

"That was only because I hit the table on my way down, and it was five minutes Jace."

"Well if it was me I would just get back on the couch. You stayed on the floor in your painful agony."  
"Well-"  
"Will you two stop making this into a competition about how manly the both of you are? We get it, you both need to get smaller egos!" Clary shouts, her voice assertive, but I can tell the playful tone in her voice.

"I know that you _love_ me little sister." I encase her in a big hug, lifting her feet off the ground, something that she hates.

"Jonathon Christopher Fairchild put me down right now!"

"Well if you insist, sister dear." I drop her onto the couch, preparing myself for her wrath.

"Oww Jon why is there something sharp in-between the couch cushions? It just poked me in the eye!" Clary exclaims, this time pain is in her voice. _Really Jon! Why did you do that!_

"Clary I'm really sorry I mean-"  
"Why did you have to-" her face looks likes she's _seriously_ pissed off, "be so gullible!" Clary finishes, bursting into a laugh session.

"You little… I'm gonna… You are so lucky I love you little sister." _Ugh how did she trick me and get the upper hand? Just you wait Clary._

Meanwhile, Jace has an amuse, _'_ 'you are all a bunch of idiots' look on his face. But then he shares a look with Clary, and nods.

"Jon, you know how I've really been enjoying hanging out with everyone in our friend group, except ratface."  
" _Simon_." Clary clarifies.

"Fine, even _Simon_ , but there's been a new… development in our group that you might not like."  
"Now I just want you to keep an open mind about what we are about to tell you Jon, please. Remember that you love me."  
"What's going on? You guys are seriously freaking me out." _A new development? What is that supposed to mean? Maybe the don't like Janice? I really hope not._

"Well," Jace starts, "I kinda sorta maybe asked out Clary." _HE ASKED OUT MY LITTLE SISTER!_  
"And I said yes." YOU SAID WHAT CLARISSA!

Just like that, all I see is red. Red hot BETRAYAL "How could you Jace! I trusted you to be goo _friends_ with Clary, and you go and ask her out! You are just a player that will hurt my sister! I am not going to allow you to hurt Clary!"

 _How could he? He knows that he will get tired of Clary eventually, and toss her aside like he does with all of his girlfriends.  
_ "How could you Clary! You know that he's going to hurt you and you just do that!"

"Jon calm down. You aren't thinking straight, just sit down and I'll explain everything."

My sisters words hardly register in my brain, before I put all of my power into a fist that connects with Jace's jaw. I burst into a flurry of posts and kicks, putting all of my anger into beating Jace into nothing. _He. Will. Hurt. Clary._

"JON! Get off of Jace!"

"Jon get off of me!" Jace shoves me off of him, but that only gives him moment of relief before I am launching myself back at him. But then I'm knocked to the ground by… Clary?  
"Clary? Why did you tackle me?"  
"Jon! Why did you attack Jace?"  
"Because he is just a player that will hurt you. Now get off of me so I can pummel him into tomorrow!"  
"Jon are you even listening to yourself? Do you want to kill your best friend? Look at what you did to him!" I take a glance over at Jace, and I am shocked at what _I_ did. Jace's face si re all over, there are claw marks on his arms, and a dark bruise that is starting to form on his left eye. But the worse part, Jace has a look of hurt on his face.

"Jon, I promise you, I am _not_ a player anymore. I never will hurt Clary again, and I regret who I was before. I'm not the same person that I was a couple months ago. Clary is an amazing person who has changed my life for the better. If I hurt her… I'd let you pummel me into tomorrow. Please, we haven't even been out yet, _both_ of us wanted your approval first."

The hurt in his expression is almost heartbreaking. What was I thinking? He's different now. Jace actually cares about Clary, and I doubted him. There is no hesitancy, no nervous jitters, Jace really cares about Clary.

But can I trust him?

I can trust Jace, I can trust him to take care of my sister.

"Jace, you have one chance. And if you ever hurt my little sister… You'll regret it."

"Jon, you act like I can't beat him up if he hurts me." Clary says, while striding over to Jace. _If Clary trusts him, I can trust him. Remember that Jon, don't lose your head._

"Jon, you won't regret it, thank you so much." Jace pulls me into a bone-crushing hug, like I scored the winning touchdown against our biggest rival, Idris High. He wouldn't screw this up, Jace actually _likes_ Clary. Something I've never seen him do. It gives me hope for their relationship.

I can only pray that I made the right decision. But looking at the two of them stare at each other, both of them have a look I've never seen on either of them.

I definitely made the right choice.

 **Review Responses: (They may sound generic, but it is heartfelt.)**

 **Fanfiction and Chocolate: Too bad the update took so long this time, but Clace!**

 **Fangirl89723: I think that Simon may be getting over Clary, and who knows what other girl might show up in his life? *hint hint***

 **cheshire15: Thank you!**

 **RubyDrew14: Thank you, I think it took a bit too long, but finally Clace!**

 **Howling2themoon: I'm glad that you like this story so much to keep on reviewing, an 'awesome' is an awesome review that gives me inspiration.**

 **ageofclace: I agree, Jace isn't so smooth when he actually cares about a girl.**

 **Guest: That makes me so happy, thank you! And I think that Aline will slowly, but surely swing that way.**


	35. She Has The Prettiest Eyes

**Hey, sorry for being MIA for a month! I am so sorry, I got wrapped up in summer and this impossible English course my teacher recommended for me. I actually have this big test that I should be studying for, but I was so upset that I had to write.**

 **I just have to do a rant about the attack on Pulse, in Orlando. I almost cried when I heard about it, and I am crying as I write this. I can't believe the nerve of a man who, may I remind you, WAS ON A FRIGGIN GAY DATING SITE A COUPLE OF MONTHS BEFORE HE DECIDED TO ATTACK ON SAME GENDER COUPLES. LIKE WHAT IS WRONG WITH THAT! YOU SHOULD NOT HURT SOMEONE JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN WHAT THEY BELIEVE IN. THERE ARE NOW SO MANY BROKEN FAMILIES AND RELATIONSHIPS, FROM ONE IDIOT'S RECKLESS ACTIONS. THERE HAVE BEEN MORE MASS SHOOTINGS IN THE USA THIS YEAR, THAN DAYS IN THE YEAR. AND IT'S ONLY GOING TO GET WORSE. THERE IS A IIWAY TO GET YOUR VOICE HEARD, AND THAT IS NOT THE WAY. ESPECIALLY IF YOU ARE HURTING OTHERS FOR YOUR OWN PERSONAL GAIN. THAT JUST MAKES IT WORSE. I HOPE THAT BASTARD ROTS IN HELL FOR WHAT HE DID!**

 **Anyways… huge shoutout to Amma Lightstairs, and a guest that commented earlier for the inspiration for this chapter!**

 **(Sorry I haven't looked it over for grammar, I promise I'll do it tomorrow. I just wanted to bet this up because I've been gone for so long.)**

 **Aline**

Have you ever made a decision, good or bad, that just completely changed your life? Ever made a choice that was just so colossal, you can't even believe where you are now? With me and Clary confessing to each other about our troubled pasts, we are now best friends.

Although it was a _bit_ of a difficult transition. More like a _really_ difficult transition. Jon was hesitant at first, but he easily agreed with Clary. _He cares about his sister so much._ Simon was the one who had a serious problem with me.

 _Flashback to a couple days ago_

 _"You sure that I can eat lunch with you and your friends?" I can't lie, I'm insanely nervous about eating lunch with Clary and her friends. So many things could go wrong. I know that Jon just agreed to this yesterday, and I haven't even talked to Simon yet._

 _"Of course! I just told Simon yesterday, and Jace and Jon are totally fine with it. Besides, everything's cool now." Clary's voice was calm and soothing, gentle as a mother's touch. Something I haven't had in a very long time_

 _Approaching a lunch table has never been so terrifying. What if it's all a trick? What if this is all a scheme to hurt me? What if-_

 _"So she actually showed." Simon says, annoyance rippling off of him._

 _"Simon!"_

 _"What Clary? What am I supposed to think?" Simon practically shouted, pointing an accusing finger at me. This is exactly what I was afraid of. I knew they wouldn't accept me in their group. I'm never going to fit in anywhere._

 _"Simon's right, I've caused you enough trouble. I think that I'll just go eat lunch somewhere else."_

 _"No!" Clary shouted, stopping me in my tracks._

 _"Aline, you can eat lunch here, no problem." Jon started, "it's just a bit of an adjustment."  
"Guys, it's no problem. I'll just eat somewhere else." Not that I want to, but I don't want to start anymore drama. Angel knows I've had enough of that…_

 _"See! She agrees."  
"Okay Simon that is enough." Jace states, leaning over him like prey and predator. It's pretty obvious who was who. "How dare you speak to Aline like that, criticizing her for who she used to be! You turned on your best friend and hurt her so badly. Then she forgave you and we accepted you. So you want our forgiveness but we can't give to anyone else? If that is all that you want, then just leave." Mouth gaping, I swear Clary was about to kiss him. _

_"Whatever," Simon stated, stomping away like a five-year old._

 _"Hey, I'll go talk to him. Just chill." Then Clary left me alone with Jon and Jace. Not awkward at all…_

 _End Flashback_

Clary said that she sorted everything out with Simon. But his body language says otherwise. Around me, he's stiff, give short and curt responses, and he tries to avoid me. But it's only Simon, I can tolerate it.

All I know, is ever since the girl's locker room about two weeks ago, my entire personality has flipped. I have best friend I've always dreamed of, I smile now at others, and I don't have people shrinking away from my view. It actually feels quite nice to be treated as an equal to other people.

Everything has changed for the better, except my father. And Simon. "Dad" is one problem that I will _never_ get rid of. _Can't wait until I'm 18!_

But everything else is spectacular. Can't lie about that. Clary is so fun to hang out with, I've never had a girl friend to talk and have sleepovers with. The same goes with her, since her best friend over the years was Simon. It feels… amazing to be able to trust someone for once.

For so long I've been ignoring people and keeping all of my emotions bottled up. Having someone to unload on, someone who can understand what it's like to go home everyday with fear, is the best feeling in the world. Clary is someone who I can trust, even after all that I've done to her over the years.

Now I'm at Helen Blackthorn's house, working on our Julius Caesar presentation.

Helen, she's something else. Even when I was the _old_ me, Helen never tore away from my glance or called me a slut behind my back, like other girls did. She always gave me a friendly smile, then went on with her business.

Helen is special, and she never treated me like everyone else did. She shows kindness to everyone, and never looks away. Even though it's just a partner project, I still don't deserve even that.

Don't deserve her kindness, her gentle smiles, her rosy lips that looks so kiss- _Wait WHAT?_

 _I can't like Helen! I can't think about her in that way! It goes against how I was raised, and if my father ever found out… He would kill me. That bigoted pig would find out somehow. Besides, society seems to hate same gender relationships. The mass shootings are proof of that. Those poor couples. I can't imagine what those families are going through._

 _Besides, why would Helen every like someone like me? A hurt, obnoxious, person never gets liked._

"Aline, you there?" Helen quietly asked, looking at me with those gorgeous blue-green eyes.

"Yeah, just thinking about this project."

"It is quite annoying to have to write this 5 page paper."  
"Well I think that we should just stab Caesar so we don't have to do this silly paper."  
"That is totally my favorite movie of all time! I literally memorized the entire quote!" _How have I never noticed how pretty her laugh is?_

 _"_ Same!"

"Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant-"  
"while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet?" I finished, my grin as large as Helen's.

- _An hour later-_

Conversation with Helen flew by so easy. We laughed, and had a great time. We even managed to finish the essay, while quoting our favorite movie.

 _Who knew school could be so fun?_

"And that should do it. Hallelujah."

"I know right."

Looking up from my laptop, I found myself staring right into those beautiful eyes. The eyes that seemed to be looking into my soul. It was terrifying and mesmerizing at the same time. I just couldn't tear my gaze away.

 _Screw it,_ I thought, and started leaning in.

 **Jace**

 _Is a date supposed to be this nerve-wrenching? Are simple steps to her door supposed to feel like my feet are in quicksand? Why am I feeling this way? How is Clary making me fall apart without a word?_

I guess that's what it feels like to really are about someone.

 _What if she hates my guts? What if Jon kicks me out before I can speak with her? What if-_

 _Calm down dude. Just relax and be yourself. One foot in front of the other. Good you made it to the door. Now knock and get ready._

"Come in," answers my date's brother. "I feel like I should give you a threatening speech, but something tells me that you won't screw up."  
 _Don't look at me with those accusing eyes!_

"No sir-I mean Jonathan-I mean Jon." _Way to play it cool. Idiot._

"You. Are. A. Nervous. Wreck!" He gets out in-between laughs. _more like snorts._

"What is that racket?" A voice asks, and what I see next renders me unable to move.

 **That's a wrap! Thanks again to everyone who takes time to read my terrible grammar that i call fanfiction. If you want anything to happen for Clace's date, respond, and I'll try!**

 **Review Responses: (That may sound generic, but they are 100% not.)**

 **LunaNight9: That sounds like an amazing book! Congratulations on coming up with what sounds like an amazing book. I can hardly write in 3rd person, and a different gender perspective… Claps to you!**

 **Fanfiction and Chocolate: Thank you so much! Sorry it's so late! XD**

 **lazyfangirl: I'll see what I can do…**

 **Guestvn:Thanks, I do have a lot of errors in this story though. I'm trying to edit better, and this story is far from over.**

 **RosesAreBloos475: Great name, and that's so sweet! There are defiantly a ton more chapters because I make them so short. And there's always drama in this story!**

 **Amma Lightstairs: I have you to thank for this chapter, anymore great ideas? Also, thank you!**

 **Fangirl89723: I think that may happen in the future, thanks for the idea!**

 **Eliza1327: Oh Jon definitely isn't going to let Jace off the hook. I expect someone to get grilled after the date…**

 **WriterGirlJB: Absolutely! Someone else has probably used the term too, and I would love to read your series someday!**

 **AlesiaJ89: He really is… Nice profile pic! (Not sarcastic)**

 **KackyK04: You have no idea how much that comment means to me. Thank you so much!**

 **A huge thank you to anyone who leaves positive comments on this story, and to everyone's great ideas! It just makes me so happy every time I read one!**

 **And 175 reviews!? YOU GUYS ARE AMAZING!**


	36. ON HIATUS-PLEASE READ

**Hey everyone, I am so sorry for how late my updates have been. I am putting this story on hiatus, I just have terrible writer's block. I had an outline for this entire story when I started it, but it wasn't very detailed, and I have changed a lot of it. I want to take time off to figure out where exactly this story is going, because honestly, I don't even know anymore. I'm really sorry to those of you who wanted more updates, but I don't know what to make my chapters about anymore. I need to make a better plan for this story, to get it back on track. I hope it shouldn't take more than a month or two, and I'm sorry taking so long.**

 **-lifeisbooks**


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